Ok so this is quite literally happening as i type. My girlfriend of nearly a year is leaving me, not for another man(although it wouldnt supprise me i have had my suspisions), not for any of the typical reasons(well to non-depressed ppl anyway). She is leaving me because i told her i was depressed today so that is why i havent been talking to her, she asked what was wrong and i cant tell her. If i did she would either a: use my own feelings against me or b: leave me right then, i mean would you want to be with someone who was the cause of their dysfunctional family, the one who caused the divorce and basically every problem the family has ever had. Hell i dont even want to be me so how can i tell the one person in this world who hasnt ran screaming from my life yet that i am severely depressed, bipolar, and extremely suicidal. Im at the point now where its an odd day when i dont think about suicide or stand on an overpass for and hour or so and just look down at my potential doom, or is it freedom? I just cant do it i cant tell her ive been hurt too much to do it ill do anything else but tell her, id even marry her right this instant and get her pregnant even though i have no way to support even myself just to keep her mind off the subject of what im depressed about. Please someone tell me what to do that doesnt involve me telling her but somehow being able to keep her i do love her and dont want to lose her but there are some things i just cant do and tell her my entire past, not just the churched up stuff, is one of them. Oh yeah and im a lot slow and cannot figure out the chat room thing cant access it, an i just retarded or do i have to pay or be a certain member rating or something?