Yo Urban Camping, chilling in the city life. Yo

Discussion in 'Rants, Musings and Ideas' started by Lars, Dec 5, 2013.

  1. Lars

    Lars Member

    So I have been homeless since october first, and I wouldnt change a thing. Life is very special and I feel lucky and happy to be able to enjoy everyday I have been given, I feel lucky to be able to enjoy the world that has been created for me. I think about the people on the street who are addicted to drugs, alcohol and have been abused, who are now down and out. I have seen people piss and shit on the street, fights where one guy has been left with a swolen left side of his face, stabbings, gun shots, people asking me for a light so they can take a hit of their crack pipe. But I feel a sort of motivation and an uplifting feeling knowing that I was able to witness some of the world. Life is to short not to be able to enjoy the finer things, like being able to close your eyes and sleep for 2 hours, wake up and go to work with a positive attitude that builds people up ( well I would like to think that I build people up ). I dont want to bring people down, especially if somebody is in a depressed or stressful state, there has been to many days where I have felt stressed and depressed and it is a heavy weight on my shoulders. I would hate to put my problems on someone elses shoulders, so I keep them inside and try my best to be uplifting and positive. Always thinking about the betterment of human society and my community in which I live, the solution I found was being myself. I am writing this note from a store in a bum infested dirty part of town where up, or crack is the drug people enjoy. I enjoy getting high of life and weed, I start off with a feeling of enjoyment, because I was able to wake up and see the sun shine, or see the rain clouds form. I feel lucky to feel the rain on my skin, and to feel cold, when I am cold I cant wait for a warm sensation ( that doesnt always come easy ). I look for places where heat falls from the bus, or the train, or the vents that come up from the city street, and I chill there for a minute to bask in the joy of heat. If I was never cold I would never know what the feeling of joy from heat would be like. I am thankful for everyday I have, I used to dread waking up and seeing the sun, thinking to myself that I have never asked to be born. But after being homeless I have come to realize that my life is really not that bad. I wake up early to meet my roofing crew and we try our best to get something done. I have worked in a lot of factories before roofing, doing mindless tasks, I should have been a robot for most of my life, but now I can find peace, happiness and enjoyment when I move. I move around town like a dirty bum, looking at pretty girls might of well be a waste of my time, but I still enjoy to be in their company. I am to shy to try and talk with them, to self conscience, thinking to my self that I am a loser and cant possibly talk or pick them up. But I have become to realize that I am better than most people I work with, I am better because I think about others, I have compassion, a gentle side, a care. I care because I have experienced what it is like to be depressed and ignorant to the way life should be lived. I have understood that life should be lived with a gentle heart and a humbling feeling of feeling small. I may be small, but I am feeling happy now, because I have been able to see a rougher side to life, the rougher side of life has made me appreciate the times where my life is easy going. Sleeping on the train, bus, or a car is better than a park bench, but I can still wake up from a bench and have enough energy to out work most of my co-workers. The problem with my life is myself, I think to negative, I think about smoking weed and drinking, getting high and not the gentle uplifting side to life I know should be enjoyed. It brings me down but then I bring myself back up by looking at the beautiful world that has been created for me. More to come later I gotta take a piss, I will go behind the store and piss in an alley. P√čACE