i get so tired of my parents guilt trips with money. i try so hard to show them i appreciate them. always sending them random 'i love you' texts. asking to take them out to dinner or just somewhere fun. i try to be home for dinner. i try to always tell them 'thank you'. most of the time telling them what they want to hear... but no. NEVER is it good enough. and the most f***ed up part is. they're right. IT ISN'T GOOD ENOUGH so how do i pay them back for them paying for my life? how do i live my life going to college, working, and friends and still give them 100% because they paid for my life. and do you know how hard it is for me to be nice to them when i f***ing HATE THEM! but no matter what, they paid for everything. and there is no way to pay it back. i don't have all the money they spent on me to give back to them so they'll leave me the F*** alone! i can't do an eye for an eye and i don't have the energy to move out. i feel so apathetic and i am not afraid of death. if they want me out because i am so terrible, then i will die because i don't have the energy or will to try and get away from them. I DON'T CARE i feel so numb that its like 'well, fine then. i give up.' I'M TIRED! I JUST DON'T HAVE THE ENERGY TO DEAL WITH THIS!!!