You saved my life

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Joey.S, Jun 25, 2007.

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  1. Joey.S

    Joey.S Member

    At the age of 13 was when i realized that i was no longer happy with life. I was ashamed of my depression and hid it from everyone.

    At this point in my life my problem was not life threating, and my friends and family gave me a sense of hope and happiness. I met a wonderful girl when i was 15 and we began to date. She became my best friend.

    During this time i thought i was truly happy for the first time in 2 years. I had many friends and met a girl that i cared deeply for. but this feeling of happiness soon faded a few months later. I began to feel worthless, and as if everyone hated me. this caused my depression to grow.

    I cut myself off from all of my friends and family, not speaking to anyone for periods at a time. I began to eat very little and i was soon sent to theropy by my parents. Theropy was a complete waste of time because the doctor was not very open minded about anything. so this caused me to lose hope. then things turned for the worst, after 3 years of dating, my bestfriend and i seperated.

    After this i began to abuse drugs and became addicted to all types of stimulents, i began spiralling out of control. I would find myself every morning getting totaly F***ed up in my car before school snorting all kinds of pills. This became a daily activity for me which led me to stop eating. All of the pills caused me to stay up for days at a time and go with out eating for days.

    During this time i became extremly depressed and wanted to die. this went on for months until my mother took me back to therapy. which was once again a failure. after this i was done. i was ready to end my life. A few weeks later i attempted to end it. I tried to sufficate my self at the age of 17.
    I failed and awoke 1 hour later on my bathroom floor.

    After that my life has never been the same. I turned into a careless human being, my whole life was filled with apathy which led to more drug abuse, i began smoking pot to help and this turned into getting high all day every day for months. I began using pshycidelics and doing hard partying almost everynight.

    This brought me to a even darker point in my life. which is where i am right now. I have lost all of my friends and my family has givin up on me because of my drug abuse. Tonight was going to be my last night here, but then i stumbled upon this site, and i starting to read some of the members stories, and just the thought that there are others out there like me gives me a huge amount of hope.

    This site was a huge life saver for me tonight and i am so greatful that all of you shared your stories and outlooks.
    THank you so much you all saved my life tonight i plan on being an active member on this site to help me and hopefully all of you with the problems that we face.
    I will never be able to thank you enough...
  2. Shadowlands

    Shadowlands Official SF Hugger Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    Welcome on board! Hope this place continues to save people in despair.
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