I never needed you like I need you now. I can barely type for crying. I cant believe that this is all we amounted to. I was going to propose on new years eve. I was going to ask you to do something so stupid as to write a life plan for all the imortant times we still have to come, the wedding the baby, the life. I love you. I'm sorry. I can't do this without you. I cant survive without you. Why couldn't you just believe how perfect you are? Why if you are perfect did we argue so often, why arent you here. Goodbye baby, my last breath is yours, to say I love you... ...'til the end.