Young mums

Discussion in 'Soap Box' started by Just_visiting, Nov 12, 2006.

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  1. Just_visiting

    Just_visiting Well-Known Member

    Hey guys. i was thinking about this earlier and thought i would ask for some more peoples opinions. Teen pregnancy is becoming increasingly more common in today's society and i was wondering everyones opinion on it. Plus young mums seem to get alot of a hard time, being called whores or criticised for spending the tax payers money. Do you think they deserve this rep? Or should ppl b more understanding? Finally what qualifies as a young mum? I mean there has to b a cut off point surely when u r a young mum to when u rn't? Does ur opinion change if they are single or in a relationship?

    Personally my opinion is a young mum is any1 20 and below. I think teenagers should be encouraged to have safe sex but accidents do happen and for those that face up to this and bring the baby up should be commended for it and not slandered. Not all young mums are "whores" or "sluts" that sleep around. And alot of them are VERY good mums. It frustrates me when ppl assume that just because someone is young and has a baby they r a bad person or bad parent.

    Anyway thats just my opinion. What do u think?
    L1

    P.S. I hope this thread does not offend any young mums on this site. That was never my intention as i have two friends who both have babies and r great parents. Thanks
     
  2. GhostOfYou

    GhostOfYou Well-Known Member

    um as long as the girl isn't immiture and like getting pregnant to prove her parents wrong and stuff.
     
  3. Ziggy

    Ziggy Antiquitie's Friend

    I wouldn't call a 20yr old a young mum. There's a lot of difference between being say 14 and 20. I'd say a young mum is someone under 16. or maybe 18... hmm not so easy to decide is it? Either way I wouldn't base my arguments on whether someone was a whore or not but would consider the material and social aspects in each individual case.
     
    Last edited by a moderator: Nov 12, 2006
  4. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Such cases should be decided on an individual basis, and not grouped into one bunch of "good" or "bad" young mothers. Some women are ready to be good mothers at a young age, but it's also a fact that the younger the female, the more health risks are associated with pregnancy/birth. Not to mention, the younger the girl is, the more of her own childhood/adolescence is taken away by the childcare required for the baby. So, really, it's a very individual thing. I won't lump together in one group ALL young mothers - under 18, for example - because each young mother is different.

    My first was born when I was 24 and the last when I was 40, and I remember the stress I was under caring for a new baby as a new mother, and I wouldn't wish that stress on anyone - especially not a girl much younger than I was then. It was a lot to deal with, even at 24.:eek:hmy:

    least
     
  5. Just_visiting

    Just_visiting Well-Known Member

    Least i disagree on the thing that u sed about there being more health risks for young mums. The likelihood of disorders in the baby increases as the women ages. For example an older women is more likely to have a baby with down syndrome. Also i was told by a doctor that "our bodies are better suited to carrying children at a younger age" obviously this may be wrong but its wat i was told. Finally if you look back into the past, such as victorian times, most women were marreid and having children by the time they were 13. Obviously i am not suggestin that children should be married and having children by the time they are 13 in today's world but i am just pointing out that once it was the trend and perfectly healthy.

    Anyway thanks for your opinions.
    L1
     
  6. theleastofthese

    theleastofthese SF Friend Staff Alumni

    Lonely One;

    Yes, it once was the trend, but the lifespan was also shorter then too, and many more women died in childbirth than do now, whether it was for lack of medical knowledge/help or other reasons. The health risks I was talking about were to the (young) mother, not necessarily the baby. I do indeed know the risks to the baby being born to older mothers, as my last three were born at my ages 35, 37, and 40. I had the amniocentesis (spelling?) procedure done for the last three, to determine if the baby was alright... tho I don't know what I would have done had the results been "not alright"...:unsure:

    I do know one thing for sure: in my next life I'm having all my kids before age 30, as 40 is really pushing it for me! Having the baby at 40 was easy - keeping up with her once she was born, now that's hard!!:rolleyes:

    least, old mama
     
  7. immure

    immure Account Closed

    i had babies when i was young because i wanted to be loved by someone so badly that i was manipulated into the situation. no child deserves to be born with a job its not right for they will not fill it. they r there own little creaters. i must also say i spend many of my minutes in my days alone with only my children the consquences are heavy and intence if u r not willing to give up the things that would not build up ur baby u r nt ready. this includes sleeping, cds, new clothes concerts and many many more things. for time and money will be spent on the babies needs. i really think this is the kicker. i have known 16 yr olds better as a mom then 30 yr olds it just depends on ur approuch and perspective and how well u can temper urself in many areas and many lvls.
     
  8. Syd

    Syd Guest

    I wouldn't advise anyone to consider having a baby until they're educated on psychology and parenting, have a steady job and enough finances, as well as a suitable home to care for the child. In addition, there should be both a loving father and mother who will have enough time to spend with the child, and schooling plans should be thought out well so that the educational experience of the child is also enjoyable. Only if all the above requirements are met would I advise having a child. Generally, someone under the age of 18 will not meet these requirements. Hell, even most 25 yr. olds aren't ready yet.
     
  9. muslim

    muslim Well-Known Member

    I agree with syd in most things
    having a child isnt that simple
    it must be prepared by a mom could carry responsibility of growing a child
    and father know the meaning of responsibility
    in brief there must be a small family moves as one mass to face life
    that dont bassically depend on the mom age may be a mom of 18
    is ready to have a child than one for 30
    but the secret of success is marriage and then children
     
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