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Your imput, please...

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I really would like your imput to my belief..

First I would like to describe the incident that defined my belief in life after death. I was a new graduate nurse who ended up working in a pediatric ICU. On my lunch break, I would leave the ICU and as I walked down the hall to leave I would look through the windows into the individual rooms on the pediatric floor. One night, I looked into the room of a three year old boy that was dying from a tumor and saw him lying on his back with his arms outstretched and he was very animated and laughing. This was the first time that I has seen any emotion from him. Usually, he would just lie there and stare off into space. I was so shocked that I called a CNA over to witness this. We watched him for about 2 to 3 minutes. My break was over so I had to go back into the unit and the CNA went back to her work. About five minutes later code blue was called and I immediatly knew who it was. He had died. There is absolutly no doubt for me that one or more spirits came to escort him from this life.

Now, even though I am a member here and I think about leaving this earth every so often, I do believe that all that we go through here in this life is what we are suppose to go through. I look at this place as a school for us. I believe in reincarnation, I feel that I have lived several lives here. I do not belong to any religious group nor do I attend any meetings on the subject even though I probably should. I believe that we are given certain things to overcome before we are born. I also believe that if I were to commit suicide, I would have to "redo" the same things all over again. I know that one of the things that I am suppose to overcome in this life is lonliness. This seems to be the bane of my existance and from reading the many posts here, it seems to be many people's problems. Even as a child I have felt alone. I have always felt "apart" from everyone. To this day I seem to carry this invisible sign around that says "keep your distance". I am not trustful of people and wonder what people want when they try to get close to me. I have been married twice and money seemed to be what they really wanted. I am afraid to let any man get close to me because I am sure that they will just end up leaving me. And there is a part of me that likes having my own space. I have been told that I am pretty and I look much younger than what I am and people wonder why I remain alone. We all have "baggage", and have our insecurities but when it comes down to the truth we all are the same. There is nothing wrong with who we are, just how we persieve ourselves.

So, now I await you input.


I think that you are right in the idea of attending meetings to further your belief along... It is possible that what you witnessed is as you said it, but my anylitcal mind says 'what sort of brain tumor did he have? where was it in his brain? was it more aggravated just prior to his death that would have given him 'visions' if you will that to him were vividly real... I dont meen to be a bummer in any way, I am an atheist, but respect the beliefs and opinions of all people.. good luck in your search
I think what you had to say was really interesting.

I lean towards reincarnation...although I am not completely sure of what I really believe in. However, I do lean towards believing that this life is a stepping stone among many lives; that what we do here effects what kind of life we will live later. Maybe if we commit suicide, we will have to redo that life and learn from our mistakes once again. Maybe throughout all the lives a person can live there are certain things you have to live through, depression, wealth, happyness, poverty, etc. Or maybe this is the one shot we get, the one chance we have at happyness, but some people just don't know how or don't want to get that happyness?

I also think death is an interesting thing. My mother found out that she was having my youngest brother the same week that she found out my grandmother (her mother) had cancer and had nine months to live (my brother was an "accident"). It is kind of like my grandma gave my brother life by her dying. She ended up dying six months after my brother was born, so my brother has no true memories of her, yet when he was learning to crawl he would climb up on my mom's dresser and reach for my grandma's picture.

i also have an idea of how you feel with not letting anyone get close to you. as a child, i had friends but no one that i completely trusted. it was like no one could live up to my standards of being my "best" friend. even the people that i call my good friends, i wouldn't trust with all my secrets because no matter how close you are to them they could end up fucking you over. a little over a year and a half ago, i started dating my current boyfriend. it's the longest and healthiest relationship i have been in, yet i still get scared that one day he will just up and leave me and i still have issues with telling him how i feel about certain things. i don't really know why i am like that. i like to blame it on my father committing suicide with i was 15, but i know that isn't true. i was like this way before it happened. i've always been this way. i'm afraid that i always will be...

i just rambled quite a bit and spilled out a lot of me, a lot more than i thought i would.

i guess i am done now.



SF Friend
Staff Alumni
I too believe in reincarnation. It makes sense to me. I also believe in many things and concepts that invite doubt, if only because I want to believe in the impossible. I believe in things because I WANT to believe, cause there are some things that are taken on faith alone, for which we cannot prove or disprove conclusively. I believe because I CAN believe. I respect the beliefs or disbeliefs of others because to someone else, I am one of the 'others'.



Account Closed
i could see reincarnation as a miss interpretation of the experience.there is a whole bunch about our surroundings we do not have the ability to notice. around us. no concluded absalute to acount here but we r all on to something.thinkin outloud.ask questions more questions
our need to know is our inability to learn.
in kindness
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