Your views

Discussion in 'I Have a Question...' started by Concrete_Angel, Jul 18, 2014.

Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.
  1. Concrete_Angel

    Concrete_Angel Forum Buddy

    I am officially an adult in 19 days. But I'm really scared. Everybody says about negative things when your an adult and there's no happy things. Pressure of bills, jobs, money etc. Plus there's great expectations of being an adult. You have to be responsible, move out. But I'm not ready for those things. I feel really vulnerable and too small to be an adult. I don't want to have to deal with the anxieties and fear and more stress than what's already there. Can anybody ease my mind about being an adult? Thankyou
  2. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I kind of think designating a specific age for "being an adult" is a little arbitrary - it's based on generalities and not on individual growth and development. So generally, people have pretty much grown physically when they reach their late adolescence. Generally, people have completed basic high school or equivalency. Generally, people have had some experiences that have helped them develop good judgment and strong decision-making skills - the ability to make their own choices in an effective way.

    Truly, I think becoming an adult actually happens in stages, not all at once. Jobs, further education, romantic interests, time for play/relaxing...they are all pieces of life...and they don't necessarily all arrive at the same time. So, like a jigsaw puzzle, the whole picture is built out of many aspects of our life. When we start to move from late adolescence into adulthood, we usually take on more of our own care - a job, a place to live, cooking and cleaning, making our way around our town/city, going to the dentist/doctor, etc, etc.

    If we tried to jump into all the responsibility at once, without giving ourselves a learning curve - time to keep learning as we go (and I think this learning goes on our whole lives) - then yes, we could feel overwhelmed. However, if we set goals, make step-by-step plans to achieve things, have some realistic expectations for ourselves, and keep an open and resilient mind (there are always ups and downs in life), then we can manage.

    That you are even feeling concerned about these things suggests that you're already thinking ahead in a responsible way. I think it's common not to feel quite "ready" - it's new and untried territory after all! A little bit of goal setting and budgeting (time, money, activities) can make a world of difference. It sounds to me like you have some growing pains that many experience as we move to new life stages/changes. I think you're already on your way and will handle the changes with grace!
Thread Status:
Not open for further replies.