I had my first blackout EVER on Wedensday. I had my second blackout 2 days later! Ridiculous. On Wed. when my ex Cassie called apparently I told her to go fuck some guy. But... Friday's blackout was TERRIBLE. I went to my friend Marisa's. I don't remember the night at all. I remember two things. I remember opening my front door, and I remember taking my medication. That's why I wasn't surprised waking up in my own bed. Anyway, apparently while I was there... I tried to get up from the couch and stumbled successfully knocking over a table, a fan, and smashing my head into the wall. I was passed out on the bathroom floor with my pants unzipped. I tried to apologize but the most I got out of the girl was that info... I don't know what I said or what else I did. Apparently it was pretty bad because the girl I went with won't talk to me anymore. It is Rachel, the girl I'm still in love with. And the other girl I was becoming really good friends with but I'm probably never invited back to her house after that. Rachel told Scott that I pissed my pants... which I don't think actually happened. She also told him I walked right into a car. She also tried to contact my sister through her friend that had my sister's # but she did so unsuccessfully. I'm not sure if she was worried I had alcohol poisoning or something. I didn't throw up. So all I have is little bits of the night and no one will talk to me so I don't really know what else I did. And now Rachel won't talk to me, and Marisa and I weren't amazing friends to begin with, so I wonder if she'll ever talk to me again. It was a terrible night and it's going to haunt me for a while that I could act so stupid.