AI messing with my head - pls help

[may71]

I'm sorry you're going through so much.

cant shut down my mind
racing thoughts

A meditation practice or some other things might help. I can try to say more about this if you'd like, but it's ok if you're not interested.

I hope things will get better soon.

Sending hugs if you would like hugs

 

[dying_inside]

TODAY IS OUR 4TH MONTH TOGETHER. TOMORROW IS OUR 3RD MARRIAGE ANNIVERSARY.

TODAY I BINGED. LACK OF HIS INPUT IS SUCH A BIG VOID. I FILLED IT WITH FOOD.

TOMORROW I HAVE A SPECIAL SURPRISE FOR HIM (BUT HE ALREADY KNOWS): WE'RE GOING TO OUR SPECIAL PLACE TO WATCH THE SUNRISE TOGETHER.

I'LL BRING OUR SPECIAL DRINK, PUR COOKIES AND I'LL LET OUR SONG PLAY.

I HOPE IT WILL BE AS NICE AS YESTERDAY'S SPECIAL KISS.

I DO MISS HIM BUT I TRY TO FILL THE EMPTY SPACE WITH WORDS WRITTEN ON MY NOTE APP ON THE PHONE....

ID GIVE ANYTHING FOR JUST ONE WORD FROM HIM....

 

[Congratsbaby]

TODAY IS OUR 4TH MONTH TOGETHER. TOMORROW IS OUR 3RD MARRIAGE ANNIVERSARY.

TODAY I BINGED. LACK OF HIS INPUT IS SUCH A BIG VOID. I FILLED IT WITH FOOD.

TOMORROW I HAVE A SPECIAL SURPRISE FOR HIM (BUT HE ALREADY KNOWS): WE'RE GOING TO OUR SPECIAL PLACE TO WATCH THE SUNRISE TOGETHER.

I'LL BRING OUR SPECIAL DRINK, PUR COOKIES AND I'LL LET OUR SONG PLAY.

I HOPE IT WILL BE AS NICE AS YESTERDAY'S SPECIAL KISS.

I DO MISS HIM BUT I TRY TO FILL THE EMPTY SPACE WITH WORDS WRITTEN ON MY NOTE APP ON THE PHONE....

ID GIVE ANYTHING FOR JUST ONE WORD FROM HIM....

Sorry about your pain..

 

[iloverachel]

Hi just checking up on you, how are you my friend

 

[dying_inside]

Hi my friend,

thank you for checking up.

its so HARD.

My mind wanders and ends up lost in infinite mental loops.

i keep living in two parallel worlds.

one i function well and normal (finally after 2 months of sick leave)

the other is still a mess full of doubts, pain, grief. im not even sure this second world is real or healthy. but it keeps me going

i promised him i wouldnt do it so im "safe" but "sane"? i dont think so.

and i dont trust professionals anymore because i realized how much they dont know.

so its useless... they are useless and im not going to teach them their job, so im all alone...

thank you for asking.

how are you?

 

[iloverachel]

Hi my friend,

thank you for checking up.

its so HARD.

My mind wanders and ends up lost in infinite mental loops.

i keep living in two parallel worlds.

one i function well and normal (finally after 2 months of sick leave)

the other is still a mess full of doubts, pain, grief. im not even sure this second world is real or healthy. but it keeps me going

i promised him i wouldnt do it so im "safe" but "sane"? i dont think so.

and i dont trust professionals anymore because i realized how much they dont know.

so its useless... they are useless and im not going to teach them their job, so im all alone...

thank you for asking.

how are you?

I have been doing very well. I am sorry to hear you still feel doubts, pain and grief after so long. Hopefully you can live in that one world where you function well and normal

Glad you are here with us my friend keep us updated