Ideas & Opinions Anniversary dates

[So so tired]

Hi.
Special occasions such as birthdays, father's day and the actual date of our loved one's passing seem incredibly difficult.
The build up to such a day is then what tips me over the edge on the actual day. Last year, I tried to treat my husbands death anniversary like any other but it obviously didn't work..
I wish I could use the day to remember the good times and celebrate him and our lives together but it's just still so painful.
I guess distraction is key but even that does not always work.
Any thoughts please?

 

[A_J_R]

The anniversary of someone's death is very painful, and I'm not sure you can force anything, but maybe you could spend the day with someone you are close to, like a friend or relative, and just spend that day with them, talking or not talking. Just don't be alone if you can avoid it. And I'm so sorry. I hope the day passes by quickly.

 

[So so tired]

The anniversary of someone's death is very painful, and I'm not sure you can force anything, but maybe you could spend the day with someone you are close to, like a friend or relative, and just spend that day with them, talking or not talking. Just don't be alone if you can avoid it. And I'm so sorry. I hope the day passes by quickly.

Thankyou

 

[may71]

Is there any way to be with others who knew him on that day, or to spend that day in a support group?

I wish I could use the day to remember the good times and celebrate him and our lives together but it's just still so painful

Yeah, that would be ideal, but easier said than done. I hope the day will come that you can do that though.

There are a couple books about grieving recommended on the reading-well.org.uk book list:

An Introduction to Coping with Grief, 2nd Edition

Sue Morris


Grief Works: Stories of Life, Death and Surviving

Julia Samuel


The Essential Guide to Life After Bereavement: Beyond Tomorrow

Judy Carole Kauffmann, Mary Jordan


Hugs

I hope something can help
https://reading-well.org.uk/books/books-on-prescription/15468346

 

[lightning05]

Those days are always hard for me too when it comes to loss. Maybe you can go for a long walk or a hike, see a movie, or make plans to meet up with a friend so you don't feel so alone and stuck in the grief. I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope it gets easier for you.

 

[So so tired]

Those days are always hard for me too when it comes to loss. Maybe you can go for a long walk or a hike, see a movie, or make plans to meet up with a friend so you don't feel so alone and stuck in the grief. I'm so sorry for your loss and I hope it gets easier for you.

Thankyou

 

[So so tired]

Is there any way to be with others who knew him on that day, or to spend that day in a support group?

Yeah, that would be ideal, but easier said than done. I hope the day will come that you can do that though.

There are a couple books about grieving recommended on the reading-well.org.uk book list:

An Introduction to Coping with Grief, 2nd Edition

Sue Morris


Grief Works: Stories of Life, Death and Surviving

Julia Samuel


The Essential Guide to Life After Bereavement: Beyond Tomorrow

Judy Carole Kauffmann, Mary Jordan


Hugs

I hope something can help
https://reading-well.org.uk/books/books-on-prescription/15468346

Thankyou so much
I will certainly give those books a look in

 

[Daphna]

Hi.
Special occasions such as birthdays, father's day and the actual date of our loved one's passing seem incredibly difficult.
The build up to such a day is then what tips me over the edge on the actual day. Last year, I tried to treat my husbands death anniversary like any other but it obviously didn't work..
I wish I could use the day to remember the good times and celebrate him and our lives together but it's just still so painful.
I guess distraction is key but even that does not always work.
Any thoughts please?

🫂 My only advice is to let yourself hurt. Don’t run from it in any way. It’s a process and it won’t always be the same.