Emotion

[HelpMePls_._]

Another ramble that I have been thinking for quite a while. If you're reading this, I'd like to hear what you think about this. Anyways..

I don't think this has much to do with depression, or suicide but I think it's still something important to think about. Feeling emotion and having an understanding of it is, to some people, more valuable than other intelligences. As presented by Aristotle, "Anyone can be angry - that is easy. But to be angry with the right person, to the right degree, at the right time, for the eight purpose, and in the right way - this is not easy."

But what about the lack of emotion. Feeling numb, or unaffected by the problems life may or may not throw at us. I think that's equally important. Not to glorify psychopaths or people unable to feel empathetic, but many experiences are nulled without emotion...

Like life, it's nuanced. Everything's nuanced. Being emotionally daft has its pros and cons, and visa versa. But what my experiences told me, is I'd rather feel nothing than something; I'd rather be the manipulator than the manipulated, and so forth. But hopefully it won't ever need to come down to that.

I feel numb, nonetheless. And I wouldn't say it's not my fault, as well. Humans can teach themselves to feel, memorize and do anything with enough practice.

 

[A_J_R]

Just from my own personal experience, I think people who manage to avoid feelings (assuming they have the ability to feel but have worked out a way to escape the deeper feelings) do so out of survival. But I don't know that they're spared anything. I do agree that it's kind of nice to feel nothing, but if someone has equipped themselves to feel nothing, they're avoiding something and somewhere deep down inside, they are still experiencing that emotion, and that's very unhealthy.

Just my first thought on that. The one thing I tell myself (an extra deep feeler) is that I hurt this bad because I loved that deeply. It helps me. And, having just gotten out of something that meant the world to me, most of the people I've confided in said that they appreciate how much I loved that person. I dunno. It's been the one saving grace in everything.

And I know I'm speaking of love and the end of love, and the general day to day minutia that brings us down (or any other matter which has us feeling so horribly). So I might be going down a different path.

 

[HelpMePls_._]

Just from my own personal experience, I think people who manage to avoid feelings (assuming they have the ability to feel but have worked out a way to escape the deeper feelings) do so out of survival. But I don't know that they're spared anything. I do agree that it's kind of nice to feel nothing, but if someone has equipped themselves to feel nothing, they're avoiding something and somewhere deep down inside, they are still experiencing that emotion, and that's very unhealthy.

Just my first thought on that. The one thing I tell myself (an extra deep feeler) is that I hurt this bad because I loved that deeply. It helps me. And, having just gotten out of something that meant the world to me, most of the people I've confided in said that they appreciate how much I loved that person. I dunno. It's been the one saving grace in everything.

And I know I'm speaking of love and the end of love, and the general day to day minutia that brings us down (or any other matter which has us feeling so horribly). So I might be going down a different path.

Thank you for commenting. I like your perspective on this.

Other people would believe investing into someone, or something emotionally leaves them vulnerable, when that someone or something eventually leaves or hurts them. As in they feel more damaged than they would be if they had dimmed their emotions. But it's an incredibly strong feat. to embrace the vulnerability of investing emotionally into someone; accepting the risks that come with it for the long term reward.

My condolences for your situation. On the bright side, you may have learned something more about yourself. If not, you've helped people around you, and me learn something new.

But earlier opinion is where we may differ. Yes, people who have managed to "escape feelings" still feel them on the inside (we are, after all, feeling creatures), and that may seem unhealthy to some people. But other people, including myself, find that subduing emotions ( allowing it to have less sway on our mentality, relationships, and so on) help us. As said earlier though, it's nuanced.

 

[A_J_R]

Thank you for commenting. I like your perspective on this.

Other people would believe investing into someone, or something emotionally leaves them vulnerable, when that someone or something eventually leaves or hurts them. As in they feel more damaged than they would be if they had dimmed their emotions. But it's an incredibly strong feat. to embrace the vulnerability of investing emotionally into someone; accepting the risks that come with it for the long term reward.

My condolences for your situation. On the bright side, you may have learned something more about yourself. If not, you've helped people around you, and me learn something new.

But earlier opinion is where we may differ. Yes, people who have managed to "escape feelings" still feel them on the inside (we are, after all, feeling creatures), and that may seem unhealthy to some people. But other people, including myself, find that subduing emotions ( allowing it to have less sway on our mentality, relationships, and so on) help us. As said earlier though, it's nuanced.

Thank you for this and for your understanding. Means a lot.

I have a good friend who always says to me, "Emotions are not the truth," and I believe he's worked his way into mostly subduing some of those feelngs that cause distress. I do agree that can be beneficial. He comes from a very dysfunctional family and had to give up his life and home to care for his mom when she was dying. I think he was able to separate things better than most people in his head and heart and that helped him get through it. So, yeah, I might agree it can be a good thing.

I'm not as good at it! Clearly.

 

[Evael]

Emotion and emotionlessness, apathy... I feel much like the latter but I'd much rather be the former. What's the point in anything if there's nothing gained from it? Psychopathy to achieve a goal... but what's the point in achieving a goal if you feel nothing from it?

I have goals I want to achieved. Or, at least, wanted to achieve... now I see little point in doing so. Even if my goals were achieved, would I feel anything at all? Doubtfully. So what's the point?

The paradox is, you need psychopathy to get where you want to be. Letting your emotions get to you will distract and ultimately defeat you. So, to achieve all you wanted, you need to do so knowing your goal won't make you feel good.

 

[HelpMePls_._]

Emotion and emotionlessness, apathy... I feel much like the latter but I'd much rather be the former. What's the point in anything if there's nothing gained from it? Psychopathy to achieve a goal... but what's the point in achieving a goal if you feel nothing from it?

I have goals I want to achieved. Or, at least, wanted to achieve... now I see little point in doing so. Even if my goals were achieved, would I feel anything at all? Doubtfully. So what's the point?

The paradox is, you need psychopathy to get where you want to be. Letting your emotions get to you will distract and ultimately defeat you. So, to achieve all you wanted, you need to do so knowing your goal won't make you feel good.

Thank you for commenting. This is really well thought and written.

I believe it depends on perception. For you, feeling something can be a motivation for achieving your goals. But I see the importance of achieving the goals I have, even if it doesn't affect me emotionally.

However, I definitely understand where you are coming from. An example would be pursuing a masters or doctrate degree in medicine. Focusing on the things that are important and dimming your emotions will help you. But once you've obtained your degree, will you feel any different than if you haven't? Will it be all for naught if you feel indifferent towards it?

The answer depends on a lot of factors, but perception is the most prominent one. People would agree that feeling nothing from achieving goals makes those goals pointless. Other people would argue that the feeling nothing doesn't retract the importance of the goal.

Neither answer is wrong or right though. As you've mentioned, the upside of apathy is allowing yourself to pursue goals with no emotional baggage. But feeling nothing when you finished your goal may make it pointless.

I have no solution for how you feel, unfortunately. Like a pot calling the kettle black, I'm in the same boat as you - even if it's for entirely different reasons. All I can say is seeking help or support professionally may help you.