I disgust myself

[asleeping]

I dont come on here very much anymore. I get all overwhelmed by how truely hurt the world appears to be. Every single thread deserves care and attention. Sorry to you all for not giving you that.

I attempted suicide about 4 months ago. Since then it has become almost as if i am only half here. I have trouble seeing my own reflection and find myself having almost out of body experiences watching myself watching the conversation around me. Does anyone else feel like this?

I have compiled a mixtape. Something to listen to when i am dieing. Radiohead, NIN, Sarah Blasko, Sia, Thomas Newman....I am selfish and self absorbed to dump this. I am sorry.

Every single paragraph thus far has started with 'I'.... and that pretty much sums up my life. I am sick of being a burden. Because thats all i am. Nothing. Filth. I disgust myself.

 

[mango_goose]

Hey, with posst sometimes we are well enough to give other posts te attention they need and sometimes where not. I know nearly everyone on this site can understand that. thats nothing to feel guilty about.

I feel like i am half here alot esspecially after my last od. not being able to taste my favourite foods and not being into anything i like. Being alive only in body but my spirit was dead. It went away after a long time. Now that i feel better i know i never wanna OD ever again AND when im suicidal ive learned to think it through first, because surviving feels worse for a long long time. NO plan is fool proof.

"dumping" this is not selfish, I think your trying to reach out for help from the only people that could possibly understand you. reaching out for some comfort while you feel so bad. Every one on this site has there bad times and there good times. If you work throuh this bad time you can come back and help other people through there bad times. and thats DEFINATLY not selfish
Please reconsider killing yourself.