Practical Advice I don't know what to do :(

[From_Venus]

The last few weeks have just been really tough for me mentally

I just haven't been able to enjoy anything. Nothing I used to enjoy has been fun, it all feels like such a chore. I feel like a zombie going through each day. The bad moments still hurt so much, and there's so much that I'm stressed about rn, but it's been ages since I've been happy. My appetite is awful, every "big" meal is a pain to go through. Thankfully, my sleep quality is still good, if I could sleep all day I would 🤭

I just don't know what to do with myself. I feel miserable waking up every day and having to be me, to look like me, to have to go to a military base every day where almost everything stresses me out, to go home and feel nothing because nothing I used to do is enjoyable anymore. I'm so lonely, my best friend rarely talks to me anymore (we've drifted apart so much after I got conscripted) and sometimes it feels like my own family wants nothing to do with me. I don't want anything to do with me.

I don't want to live like this. I can't imagine doing this for decades and decades and decades. Please does anyone know how I can at least be happy at least sometimes 😭😭😭 I'm so dead inside 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

 

[LumberJack]

I’m sorry that you have that much on your plate. Loss of enjoyment in activities is a symptom of depression, and I have had it, too. In my case, I worked with my therapist. What I ended up doing was learning to enjoy the small things; really these are everyday occurrences that are always available. For example, the taste of my coffee first thing in the morning is something I really enjoy.

So I guess in terms of practical advice, I don’t feel qualified, but I have gotten a lot better with my anxiety from learning certain skills, mostly CBT tools for the rational side, and calming strategies for the physical side. I can’t say that this will help, but it is unlikely to be a waste of time, because it should help at least a little bit.

 

[Windhover]

While I don't have an answer to your quest, I wanted to say I read your post and feel for your pain and difficulties. 😥

There are secular books written with techniques which when help give you a break from the pain. One which I used is The Mindful Way Through Depression, by John Kabat-Zinn. I think the author also has an app.

I'm glad your sleep is okay. : )

 

[may71]

I'm sorry things have been so bad.

nothing I used to do is enjoyable anymore.

What did you used to do?

my best friend rarely talks to me anymore (we've drifted apart so much after I got conscripted)

Is it just that you're physically distant now, or is it something else?

sometimes it feels like my own family wants nothing to do with me. I don't want anything to do with me.

Do you know why?

 

[1964dodge]

The last few weeks have just been really tough for me mentally

I just haven't been able to enjoy anything. Nothing I used to enjoy has been fun, it all feels like such a chore. I feel like a zombie going through each day. The bad moments still hurt so much, and there's so much that I'm stressed about rn, but it's been ages since I've been happy. My appetite is awful, every "big" meal is a pain to go through. Thankfully, my sleep quality is still good, if I could sleep all day I would 🤭

I just don't know what to do with myself. I feel miserable waking up every day and having to be me, to look like me, to have to go to a military base every day where almost everything stresses me out, to go home and feel nothing because nothing I used to do is enjoyable anymore. I'm so lonely, my best friend rarely talks to me anymore (we've drifted apart so much after I got conscripted) and sometimes it feels like my own family wants nothing to do with me. I don't want anything to do with me.

I don't want to live like this. I can't imagine doing this for decades and decades and decades. Please does anyone know how I can at least be happy at least sometimes 😭😭😭 I'm so dead inside 😭😭😭😭😭😭😭

life in the military can be very stressful for young adults especally if not voluntary. how you get through this is up to you. right now you are limited but still have choices.

do what you can to get through each day on the base, also try as hard as you can to make at least a couple of friends on base. since you get to go home at least for now try to do things that can bring you joy. most important find a hobby that you can enjoy and put some time aside for the hobby.

right now the only thing that can make this better is your brain. try to think as positve as possible. a while back i went through such a crisis. i learned that changing my outlook made a huge difference. now i think of the glass as half full not half empty. and i'm sure your family still wants you around. as for your friend maybe make an extra effort to see if it can be saved

mike....

 

[From_Venus]

I’m sorry that you have that much on your plate. Loss of enjoyment in activities is a symptom of depression, and I have had it, too. In my case, I worked with my therapist. What I ended up doing was learning to enjoy the small things; really these are everyday occurrences that are always available. For example, the taste of my coffee first thing in the morning is something I really enjoy.

So I guess in terms of practical advice, I don’t feel qualified, but I have gotten a lot better with my anxiety from learning certain skills, mostly CBT tools for the rational side, and calming strategies for the physical side. I can’t say that this will help, but it is unlikely to be a waste of time, because it should help at least a little bit.

ty

Have been struggling with dysthymia for a couple of years and it's draining me so much. I'm starting therapy soon, hope it helps!

 

[From_Venus]

While I don't have an answer to your quest, I wanted to say I read your post and feel for your pain and difficulties. 😥

There are secular books written with techniques which when help give you a break from the pain. One which I used is The Mindful Way Through Depression, by John Kabat-Zinn. I think the author also has an app.

I'm glad your sleep is okay. : )

Ty I'll check it out!

 

[From_Venus]

I'm sorry things have been so bad.

What did you used to do?

Is it just that you're physically distant now, or is it something else?

Do you know why?

I used to read, watch movies, listen to music, play video games... sadly, it's all become super unenjoyable for me

My friend and I haven't had many opportunities to hang out while I've been in the military, and it also feels like she's pushing me away. She's made new friends, and I'm happy for her, but a lot of the time it feels like she doesn't want anything to do with me anymore, like ditching me in the middle of an outing or taking ages to respond to my messages

As for my family, it just feels like they don't like me very much. My dad makes little effort to spend time with me, compared to his other relatives. My mom has a laundry list of stuff she dislikes about me, stuff like how I'm entitled and manipulative over things like me not wanting her to accompany me to my psychiatric appointments and me not wanting her to call my GP to get a refund for medication. A lot of the time her actions make me feel stressed and uneasy, and no matter how much I try to explain it, she just disregards it I wish that my parents liked me for who I am and understood what I'm going through.

 

[From_Venus]

life in the military can be very stressful for young adults especally if not voluntary. how you get through this is up to you. right now you are limited but still have choices.

do what you can to get through each day on the base, also try as hard as you can to make at least a couple of friends on base. since you get to go home at least for now try to do things that can bring you joy. most important find a hobby that you can enjoy and put some time aside for the hobby.

right now the only thing that can make this better is your brain. try to think as positve as possible. a while back i went through such a crisis. i learned that changing my outlook made a huge difference. now i think of the glass as half full not half empty. and i'm sure your family still wants you around. as for your friend maybe make an extra effort to see if it can be saved

mike....

Ty I'll try!

 

[may71]

it feels like she doesn't want anything to do with me anymore, like ditching me in the middle of an outing

Do you want to describe what happened? It's ok if you don't want to, but it might make the situation easier to understand.

 

[From_Venus]

Do you want to describe what happened? It's ok if you don't want to, but it might make the situation easier to understand.

We went out together last week and planned to stay out until dinner time. She asked if she could meet up with some other friends too but when we did, she started more or less ignoring me, I was tagging along at the back kind of pathetically. She left with them after a while and I just went home

 

[may71]

Do you feel like it would help to talk to her about how you're feeling? Do you have any sense why the change has occurred?

 

[From_Venus]

Do you feel like it would help to talk to her about how you're feeling? Do you have any sense why the change has occurred?

I don't know

But ty so much for talking to me about this, I really appreciate it

 

[may71]

You're welcome!

 

[may71]

There may be something in these two links that might be helpful:

https://www.suicideforum.com/community/threads/self-treatment-and-miscellaneous.166817/

https://www.suicideforum.com/commun...-worlds-second-largest-medical-system.166815/

 

[From_Venus]

There may be something in these two links that might be helpful:

https://www.suicideforum.com/community/threads/self-treatment-and-miscellaneous.166817/

https://www.suicideforum.com/commun...-worlds-second-largest-medical-system.166815/

tysm :3