I have issues and I am to blame for many rifts in my relationship.
I am aware of this flaw and my resolution is to not participate in certain aspects of my mate’s life. But when I voice that, even that becomes an issue.
There is a lack of respect from me. And internally I believe my mate is foolish ( to be nice).
We parent and co-parent so differently. I truly wish that he would honor my request to not know anything regarding how he [co-]parents and he would stop requiring me to spend time with them or watch his children when he works during his custody days.
I have become spiritually conflicted because my heart wants to have compassion and support but my viewpoint requires accountability and responsibility.
And with the difference in opinions, I find myself liking the kids less and respecting him less too.
1) every time we go inside a store, they beg for candy and he buys it.
I explain that they have tons of candy already at the house. I explain that their behavior and food eating habits should also determine the reward.
2) their mother just took shared kids under 10yrs old on a cruise upwards of $4000 not including other travel and purchases. He gets the kids and their hair is unkempt, clothes are mediocre at best. Yet he gives additional money for her to buy “school” clothes.
3) he pays $150 monthly cell bill for an adult child while she buys $600 purses and $1000 tickets to see a singer she likes
there’s no responsibility for anyone. Yet he rents a place that is overpriced and not aesthetically pleasing.
Priorities are just not aligned.
He is very good to me. Probably too good. I do not believe that I deserve the level of commitment and love that he displays towards me. Especially since I harbor these feelings.
My opinions are not kept silent. I have expressed my issues and yet there is no resolve. The indignant displeasure intensifies. I pray about it but it keeps resurfacing.
Lastly, I just want to not know. I have asked him not to disclose information. Yet he still does. I’m not sure what other resolution there could be other than ending the relationship so that I am not exposed to this. I want peace in my life and I do not have it dealing with this.
I am aware of this flaw and my resolution is to not participate in certain aspects of my mate’s life. But when I voice that, even that becomes an issue.
There is a lack of respect from me. And internally I believe my mate is foolish ( to be nice).
We parent and co-parent so differently. I truly wish that he would honor my request to not know anything regarding how he [co-]parents and he would stop requiring me to spend time with them or watch his children when he works during his custody days.
I have become spiritually conflicted because my heart wants to have compassion and support but my viewpoint requires accountability and responsibility.
And with the difference in opinions, I find myself liking the kids less and respecting him less too.
1) every time we go inside a store, they beg for candy and he buys it.
I explain that they have tons of candy already at the house. I explain that their behavior and food eating habits should also determine the reward.
2) their mother just took shared kids under 10yrs old on a cruise upwards of $4000 not including other travel and purchases. He gets the kids and their hair is unkempt, clothes are mediocre at best. Yet he gives additional money for her to buy “school” clothes.
3) he pays $150 monthly cell bill for an adult child while she buys $600 purses and $1000 tickets to see a singer she likes
there’s no responsibility for anyone. Yet he rents a place that is overpriced and not aesthetically pleasing.
Priorities are just not aligned.
He is very good to me. Probably too good. I do not believe that I deserve the level of commitment and love that he displays towards me. Especially since I harbor these feelings.
My opinions are not kept silent. I have expressed my issues and yet there is no resolve. The indignant displeasure intensifies. I pray about it but it keeps resurfacing.
Lastly, I just want to not know. I have asked him not to disclose information. Yet he still does. I’m not sure what other resolution there could be other than ending the relationship so that I am not exposed to this. I want peace in my life and I do not have it dealing with this.
