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#1
friends have grown up and apart. ill sit from the sidelines enjoying there happiness vicariously and hopefully fade away. leaving not even the slightest impact on anyones life ive ever met. this world makes me sick to my stomach sometimes. not enough courage to go on and not enough to end it.


happy ppl are so sick and cruel and love to see us in misery. i hope britney spears doesnt kill herself the medias driving her down the same road as anna nicole.

http://www.break.com/index/britney_spears_shaves_her_head.html
 
#2
I am sure you have made an impact on others lives. Even if you choose to fade away, you will not soon be forgotten. It is true that friends grow up and some grow apart. People cahnge as they mature and sometimes they out grow their friendships. It does not mean that you did not have an impact or make a difference. Your friendships help to shape who people are and what they become. Each of us has a purpose in others lives. I hope you find the courage to continue on. You are worth it. :hug:
 

theleastofthese

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
#3
I've always heard that depression was Anger Turned Inwards but Anger Without Enthusiasm is just as good a description for feeling depressed. I too sometimes feel that happy people are cruel, but for the most part, they're not, really. It just seems that way to me when I'm not happy. As to not having the courage to end it all... well I've decided that no matter what, I'm not going to give my pain and misery to anyone else, particularly those I love. I just couldn't do that to them, especially my kids. And who would care for my animals? Who would feed my stray kitties?? I understand very well how you feel, but realize too that your depression is making your decisions - or not allowing you to make decisions in your best interests.

I hope you start feeling better. If you're not receiving counseling or medication for your depression, it might be worth a try. It's helped me a lot.

love,

least
 
#4
"happy ppl are so sick and cruel and love to see us in misery."

that came out wrong and i think i was speaking out of anger/depression probaly some envy even. ill hang on for now and be ok i dont do counseling but maybe i should start taking the medicine i was subscribed but never took seriously. anyone out there ever had any positive outcomes to taking prozac? i didnt feel any different.
 

theleastofthese

SF Friend
Staff Alumni
#5
That may have come out wrong, but when I'm really down and hate to see happy people, I am assuredly speaking out of anger, depression, and a lot of envy... I wonder why some people seem to have it so well and easy and some have it so hard. When I'm feeling really depressed I hate to drive thru the wealthy section of town. I can't stand all that money standing around when I have to pinch every damn penny and still can't have what I need, to say nothing of what I want.
 

TLA

Antiquitie's Friend
#6
Mal-
Friends come and go. They are in out life for a season to serve a need we have or to aid us in learning a lesson. (Sometimes that is a *****).

My father always said "If you have 3 good friends when you are old, you are doing allright. If you have one true friend you are indeed very lucky." :smile:

I agree with Gentle and Least, but, you never know the inner demons that person has. Seems happy ppl have just learned how to keep that attitude. Yet I dislike the smugness they may show.
 
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