I lost my grand father earlier this year and I feel so sad. I have lot a family and very few close friends. I feel like I'm drowning in a 3ft pool with nothing but highly trained life guards standing around me. I have never felt so alone and feel like I have so much responsibility that I am wearing myself thin. I can be in a crowed room and still feel so alone. Nothing I do is ever good enough. I have always felt that way about me in life in general. Losing my grandpa has been one of the worse things to happen to me in my life. I miss him everyday. He was a great man. I feel silly writing all this. Not really sure if anyone will read this. But I had to get this off my chest. And let someone know. Whoever reads this.