I think i m goi to kill myself. I can feel the end is near. ive waited long enough. Im tired and have nothing to hold on to. I think all the happiness in the world is not gonna help. if i die i dont ever want to be reborn. Life doesnt 'just' suck EVERYTHING sucks. Even if it doesnt i dont care any more. Im think about driving very far away, so no one would ever find me. And jump into volcano or something so there will not be a trace of me left. I dont know what im, why im doing here, why me? And a thousand other whys. Whys that can only be answered with cliches. Cliches are the best cover for something so often asked yet no one had answer to. Life is meaningless. This is meaningless. meaningless. Now that i know the end is near, my body shrill with excitement with every though of it. No more suffering and bullshit about what is rightfully mine. Nothing is gonna control me anylonger. Im still figuring out how to do it, all the more excitement..