I know it's the pain talking when I see it, and I relate.
I'm going to assume for a moment while not knowing you personally, that it's IRL people that you feel don't care. And you're probably right to a degree. There's people who obviously would care about you in the world, but they're just not in your vicinity at the moment. And that's tough, it's one of the hardest things to deal with especially if you don't know how to cope with it positively. It takes practice, and even then it's still hard and would get to anyone eventually.
I'm not exactly full of advice right now, just wanted to say I read your post and read other one's by you even if I don't always reply. I don't know what to tell you about people caring but I can tell you that you can and should probably work on your self esteem if you feel you're the cause of your situation. It may not fix the problem but at least you'll feel better and more confident about yourself dealing with it. Being in a tough situation is hard, but it's worse if you give yourself blame for something you didn't do. take care