Hi all, so I am at work today and I get a phone call from my manager to meet her in a meeting room. I go into the room and there is my manager and one of the senior managers so straight away I sense an ambush. Senior manager tells me they have concerns about my internet usage and that their auditing software has set off alerts about me accessing this site as it has the word suicide in the URL. Oh we're very concerned about you they say - where was this 'concern" when I was being openly bullied by one of their star employees? In Australia bullying has been made a criminal offence and being aware of bullying and not acting on it is also an offence. So their faux concern is that I might do something and it might come back on them if it becomes public knowledge about what behaviours they allow in the workplace. So after I hear this speech about how concerned they are about me they invite into the room a "workplace psychologist" who has been lurking outside the room to talk to me about how I'm feeling and what my intentions are. So I sit and talk to him and answer all his cliche questions for an hour. Despite him saying that our conversation is confidential I am sure it isn't as he is paid by the company - not doing it out of the goodness of his heart. Really I'm annoyed about this intrusion into my life as my work performance isn't suffering. I started accessing this site to help myself and help others and to dialogue with people I can relate to. If I thought my company had any interest in my welfare I would speak to them about my problems and state of mental health but I know I'm nothing to them but just another employee and they have no interest in me just their own legal obligations. Thanks for reading if you got this far.
Accessing this site at work
- Thread starter dugga
- Start date
The way i look at it the web site is taboo at work. They are paying you to work. I at times I want to contact the forums during work hours but I don't since I am lucky to have a job. I can see the company's pov. Also since they are keying in on the suicide they want to make sure you are safe whatever the intentions are.
So stop surfing the forum at work if you don't want them to be concerned. Internet usage for personal reasons is a reason here in the us for termination or being on the layoff list.
I know I'm being harsh but looking at it from the company's pov. I have been unemployed many a time and it is not worth it to surf during work time.
So stop surfing the forum at work if you don't want them to be concerned. Internet usage for personal reasons is a reason here in the us for termination or being on the layoff list.
I know I'm being harsh but looking at it from the company's pov. I have been unemployed many a time and it is not worth it to surf during work time.
Thanks SillyOldBear, I will be more discrete in future, I don't need the aggravation or the fake concern. Funny how no one pays attention when you sit on facebook or ebay all day but other keywords triggers their software. It's more about being an "employer of choice" and showing how much they care which is really a load of crap considering some of the stuff I've seen. I know they have absolutely no interest in my state of mind - I'm just another resource to them... as Pink Floyd said just another brick in the wall.
I've been to the company psychologist at work before from my own initiative.
It helped me a lot. He's paid by the company yes but my wellbeing is important to them. Not because they care for me personaly but because an employee that is depressed and stay home cost a lot of money without producing work.
I explained my problems at work and he talked with my bosses. The problems were solved.
Sorry about the previoud message. Could'nt delete or edit it.
It helped me a lot. He's paid by the company yes but my wellbeing is important to them. Not because they care for me personaly but because an employee that is depressed and stay home cost a lot of money without producing work.
I explained my problems at work and he talked with my bosses. The problems were solved.
Sorry about the previoud message. Could'nt delete or edit it.
Businesses these days like to show that they are concerned about their employees to boost their public profile but in reality we just exist to make them money. I came onto this site to help others and myself - if I had a truly supportive workplace I wouldn't have to go to the internet to look for answers. As for their "corporate psychologist" he is big on asking questions but has given me nothing in return. I can't possibly trust someone who is being paid by my employer despite him saying our conversations are confidential. I feel safer here.
I am not sure what you think a psychologist does besides ask questions? Perhaps after a few sessions they may suggest some coping techniques, but even in suggesting those they usually due in a question format where they ask you for ideas on how to handle something differently and keep asking until you say the way they are thinking and then asking how you could apply that to the situation you experienced and then using more questions of hypothetical situations to ask how you would apply it so that it is not just some stranger telling you what to do when you get upset - it is you learning what methods could work and how to use them. What is it their psychologist was supposed to give you in return exactly? Particularly in one session when you obviously were answering questions in a contrived manner and clearly do not trust them at all? I think peer support and this site has great value- It is why i spend hours and hours maintaining it- however it does not come close to measuring up to professional counseling so far as actually addressing mental health issues - just helps with making people less lonely,maybe feeling less like a freak to some, and maybe give some ideas of other viewpoints and has a social function. It is not counseling or therapy.
I am unsure what you would have a company do to be supportive more than ask you about if was any issues and pay a psychologist and make said psychologist available for you at no charge (and apparently while on the clock still). It is your choice to take advantage of it or not. As much as counseling costs and as many people have virtually no access to it due to cost or in the rare places where it is included in universal care wait period of up to a year for a limited number of visits it would seem a very god "perk". The counselor will tell you and let you read the disclosure policy and no company cares enough about your private thoughts to risk law suits or huge fines by violating disclosure policies. But if providing thta care can help employees be more productive by not being saddled with distractive thoughts, anxiety, panic attacks, or missed work due to depression then it sounds like they get a reasonable return on their investment while the employees get a valuable perk that can improve their quality of life and help them deal with work related stress (like bullying) in the appropriate way as well. My wife has used her work counseling services in the past and many people do. It is a progressive way of addressing employee mental health issues and certainly far better than feeling bullied at work and internalizing it and making your mental health worse for it, when they are paying for a professional that if they did see a pattern of complaints about bullying could actually cause the company to look at its policies and the individuals within the company that foster the attitude that is an okay way to function
I do not know what company you work for and you may well have some very good reasons for feeling like they don't care about you- but it is also possible you have a far far better company than you think and just do not know it. Many companies (as mentioned above ) would simply fire somebody for using the computers for non work stuff since they are paying for the internet and it is their computer being potentially exposed to virus when employees are surfing and their IP being exposed to whatever web sites even if "on break" giving them potential liabilities. It is like somebody using your computer at your house -just because you were not using does not make it their computer- same with your employers computer. Some places do not care at all, most do. Many companies do not pay for a psychologist and offer free counseling or any method of addressing work place stress or issues, but yours is. You can choose to use it or not use it but your criticism of the companies attitudes and policies when it is clear you have no intention of using them to try to address issues at work or elsewhere reminds one that there are in fact 2 sides to most issues.
I am unsure what you would have a company do to be supportive more than ask you about if was any issues and pay a psychologist and make said psychologist available for you at no charge (and apparently while on the clock still). It is your choice to take advantage of it or not. As much as counseling costs and as many people have virtually no access to it due to cost or in the rare places where it is included in universal care wait period of up to a year for a limited number of visits it would seem a very god "perk". The counselor will tell you and let you read the disclosure policy and no company cares enough about your private thoughts to risk law suits or huge fines by violating disclosure policies. But if providing thta care can help employees be more productive by not being saddled with distractive thoughts, anxiety, panic attacks, or missed work due to depression then it sounds like they get a reasonable return on their investment while the employees get a valuable perk that can improve their quality of life and help them deal with work related stress (like bullying) in the appropriate way as well. My wife has used her work counseling services in the past and many people do. It is a progressive way of addressing employee mental health issues and certainly far better than feeling bullied at work and internalizing it and making your mental health worse for it, when they are paying for a professional that if they did see a pattern of complaints about bullying could actually cause the company to look at its policies and the individuals within the company that foster the attitude that is an okay way to function
I do not know what company you work for and you may well have some very good reasons for feeling like they don't care about you- but it is also possible you have a far far better company than you think and just do not know it. Many companies (as mentioned above ) would simply fire somebody for using the computers for non work stuff since they are paying for the internet and it is their computer being potentially exposed to virus when employees are surfing and their IP being exposed to whatever web sites even if "on break" giving them potential liabilities. It is like somebody using your computer at your house -just because you were not using does not make it their computer- same with your employers computer. Some places do not care at all, most do. Many companies do not pay for a psychologist and offer free counseling or any method of addressing work place stress or issues, but yours is. You can choose to use it or not use it but your criticism of the companies attitudes and policies when it is clear you have no intention of using them to try to address issues at work or elsewhere reminds one that there are in fact 2 sides to most issues.
Hi NYJmpMaster, thanks for taking the time to reply - I do appreciate it and will take on board what you have said. I agree that it is indeed a good perk to receive free psychologist sessions but I can't help but feel cynical when the same managers who stood by and watched me and others get bullied now take a sudden interest in my welfare. The same managers who told me I deserved it and that I provoked it. I complained about it at the time but was told I would never be supported if I chose to make a formal complaint as the person in question was "more important" than me. The same managers who knew I was struggling with personal issues but not once ever asked me how I was or if I needed help. After this I can't help but feel distrust and a degree of bitterness. I have a great deal of respect and loyalty to my company but not so much for the business unit I am in and its treatment of staff.
I agree with you that this site is no substitute for formal counselling but I just do not like the idea of company subsidised or initiated counsel. I would rather do it on my own even if the $$$ come out of my own wallet. I just cannot possibly trust someone who is ultimately on the company payroll. Thanks again.
I agree with you that this site is no substitute for formal counselling but I just do not like the idea of company subsidised or initiated counsel. I would rather do it on my own even if the $$$ come out of my own wallet. I just cannot possibly trust someone who is ultimately on the company payroll. Thanks again.
You , as i suspected may have, clearly have genuine reasons to be cynical. I can 100% understand your reasons for being cynical based on that as well and I think most anybody would. That said, I would suggest it may be possible to look at the psychologist as a way to address those type of work issues without filing a formal complaint. I do sincerely doubt they would violate their confidentiality policy (though it is important to know what that is exactly) to say anything to that manager about what you said- it does not make any sense for either the psychologist that risks their credentials or the business) but if the psychologist notices patterns they can and would say "frequent issues being dealt with is bullying or unfairness by managers at work" and if they have a psychologist there are clearly a big enough company and enough peopel using that it will not be attributable to one person. Typically those type of reports go to the very top anyway and may give them cause to look more closely what the middle managers are doing.
It is very easy for me to sit here 7000 miles away and say things- you work there and know your company so are your own best decision maker on things and I apologize if sounded like i was calling you "wrong". My post was more to others that may have counseling available through work that it was not automatically a bad or useless thing - but in the end is where you/ everyone else works and they bear the repercussions as well as any potential help and have to decide for themselves in their own situations. We all try to make the best decision we can for ourselves in our own unique situations and do not let anybody tell you / decide your decision is wrong- nobody else is walking in your shoes so log as is a thought out process and not impulsive we did the best we can for ourselves and second guessing ourselves just leads to unneeded stress and anxiety.
It is very easy for me to sit here 7000 miles away and say things- you work there and know your company so are your own best decision maker on things and I apologize if sounded like i was calling you "wrong". My post was more to others that may have counseling available through work that it was not automatically a bad or useless thing - but in the end is where you/ everyone else works and they bear the repercussions as well as any potential help and have to decide for themselves in their own situations. We all try to make the best decision we can for ourselves in our own unique situations and do not let anybody tell you / decide your decision is wrong- nobody else is walking in your shoes so log as is a thought out process and not impulsive we did the best we can for ourselves and second guessing ourselves just leads to unneeded stress and anxiety.