After math not so great.

Discussion in 'After Effects' started by Deletemeplz, Jul 26, 2014.

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  1. Deletemeplz

    Deletemeplz Member

    So when I was in my mid to late teens I've had several attempts, only three that a regret, SH and OD'ing and one other that I don't want to mention, anyway the multiple SH attempts landed me in the ER getting stitched up and sent out in an ems to the mental ward, that's the best part of it the worst part is there's now not a centimeter of skin on my arms that aren't covered in ugly scars, people stare at me now like I'm a freak, want nothing to do with me, and most of all the scars are like a tattoo on your face when trying to get employed, makes it extremely hard to find employment! Second one is the OD'ing, I was hangin' out with a buddy, we'll not so much a buddy more or less a "DD" and we went to his place where I found some medication in the bathroom, ended taking the full bottle, looked like it was full, didn't care at the time I just knew they would work being the type of med they were and what they are used to treat, downed all of them went swimming and I guess I passed out in the pool! But I ended up waking up at home with my mom standing over me trying to wake me up, I slept for over 24 hours straight woke up finally and didn't know where/who I was or who anyone was for that matter, so I flipped out, started going crazy tearing the house up threw my tv through the window etc, ended up being arrested and stayed the night in jail hooked up to heart monitors and whatnot, my mom came to get me and took me to the mental ward, lady there told us I had benzo retardation from the OD, after a couple years later I started having heart palpitations and feelings like my heart would slow down and then stop, then it would start fluttering real bad, it's been like that ever since the OD, never even went to the ER for the OD, instead was arrested and held in a jail cell.
    Now I probably have permanent heart damage.
     
  2. bunjyman

    bunjyman Active Member

    im not quite sure what to say except im sorry to hear that
    and if you ever want to talk i'll be here :hug:
     
  3. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Is there a doctor you can see? Heart issues are quite serious and critical.
     
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Alumni SF Supporter

    I would get myself checked out by a doctor if I were you. Did they give you any info on how your health was while monitoring your heart? Even through all the overdoses sh'ing, you're here to tell the tale and that is a good thing. It wasn't your time to go. I really hope you can get treatment for yourself now :hug:
     
  5. Deletemeplz

    Deletemeplz Member

    Thanks for the support guys, and no they didn't tell me anything because I ended up passing out there as well, guess they really didn't care, I should file a lawsuit but I'd get counter sued of course. And I'm not real interested in getting checked out. Tbh I might have even drank my liver to cirrhosis and I'm only 24
     
  6. Deletemeplz

    Deletemeplz Member

    I really just want this to be here to warn people of what can and will happen if the attempt of suicide does fail. It's not pretty and in the long run it makes your depression and suicidal ideation/tendencies far worse down the road once you live through the attempt.
     
  7. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    True. Some just learn it the hard way.
     
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