when you help others you help yourself
as most people know I suffer chronic pain and bad health problems. I have tried very hard the last 2 or 3 months. there is a possibility my pain may go down a little soon i'm usually living in the 5 or 6 range with higher spikes daily. i'm hoping to go down to around 4 to 5. my copd is a little better I don't have to use oxygen as much. and my quality of life is a little better because i'm doing more. the bad thing is everytime I do something my pain increases. I have been fighting for a long time. I find that i'm thinking those bad thoughts for longer periods more often these past few weeks. I've gone back to looking at sites that aren't exactly safe if you know what I mean. I am actually dwelling on other possibilities to end the pain and seriously considering options i'm safe for now but i'm wondering, am I losing or am I winning.