An endless cycle...

Discussion in 'Family, Friends and Relationships' started by messedupmarionette, Dec 1, 2008.

  1. messedupmarionette

    messedupmarionette Active Member

    I've been in love with the same guy for 7 years now. We met when I was 11 and since then we've had a really complicated friendship. We dated for 2.5 years, and I broke up with him in April because I'm gay. But I still love him. Since then, he's dated other people and so have I, but I haven't been serious with anybody. The problem is, we keep seeing one another and we end up having sex. It's like an uncontrollable compulsion. On Sat. we saw one another after 3 months of being apart--we go to colleges 5 states away--and everything was going fine. We were being jovial and getting along and having fun, and suddenly it became really sexual and, well.... yeah. I just don't know what to make of it.

    Also, he's my best friend. He knows more about me then I think I could bring myself to tell another person. I love him in so many different ways, and he loves me too... but we can't seem to just be friends...
  2. wunderwood

    wunderwood Well-Known Member

    I don't have the added sexual orientation issue, but my best friend/ex and i have the same sort of relationship. We can't seem to just be friends when we are in the physical vicinity of each other. It always turns into sex (which unfortunately? is awesome).

    It is so hard. Sometimes you just have to take the option out of the equation until you are both able to resist. It sucks, but just be phone and email friends. Or if you do see each other be around someone else at the same time so you don't have the option of hooking up.

    take care
  3. Entoloma43

    Entoloma43 Well-Known Member

    I'm confused. :confused:

    How are you gay, but dated, love, attracted to, and have sex with, a guy?
    Wouldn't this make you bisexual?
  4. messedupmarionette

    messedupmarionette Active Member

    That's one of the big questions I'm dealing with now. He is genuinely one of maybe 4 guys I've ever been attracted to on ANY level, whereas I've been attracted to countless girls. At this point I'm starting to consider myself queer because I am (frequently) attracted to transgendered people as well... I dunno, my sexuality is weird.:blink: I confuse myself sometimes.