Antidepressants

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#1
I have been on mirtazapine for some years but have not found it to be helpful expect for sleep, all I have from my GP is to increase the dose but that has too many side effects. Right now I just don't want to live anymore all I read or see at the moment is that you can completely heal or overcome your depression by using mindfulness and change the way you think and everything will be fine. I find this hard to believe because outside events can have devastating effects for some people however hard they may try to overcome them, true severe depression is awful.
 

Daphna

Ninja of light
#2
Doubt is a nasty habit, and it prevents people from ever trying anything. If you tell yourself you will be depressed all your life. You will be. If you tell yourself that you can change. You can. I suffered depression for YEARS. True blue, run of the mill: depression. Always holding onto some hope but not fully allowing myself to give it a shot. This is accepting your circumstances. Claiming them as who you are. Why hold onto that? That's not who I want to be or who I choose to be. Isn't it my choice after all? Destructive habits can be replaced with positive habits. Wouldn't you say?

From my experiences I know that depression stems from traumatic experiences that we hold onto. Unresolved issues that we hope to drown out by whatever means possible. It's just another form of running away. At least it was for me. I can only speak for myself. I have beat it. You can believe me or not. I have discovered that I needed closure. The best way that I got it was with forgiving others and myself. We are all confused people on this planet trying to make some kind of life for ourselves. Am I right? Yet; everywhere we turn we get hurt and we even hurt one another. Of course; I believe we are all ruled by our emotions. Reactors and terrible communicators. Can you agree with that? So in all honesty we all need forgiveness and compassion for one another. Because we are like children regardless of age. We will continue to make mistakes so that we can learn. And others will make mistakes with us as well in order to learn.

If you agree with any of what I have said; then lemme ask you. Why are you holding onto the unresolved issues that was either done to you or by you? What good is it doing for you? Do you have a choice to forgive all in your life so that you can have the closure you need to move on? I am telling everyone I meet here or anywhere else. YES YOU DO! :) Sound unbelievable? Well; you won't know for sure unless you do it.

I hope only the best for you. :hug:
 
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#3
Lucky you but have you been in your family home for 59years and looked after as a carer for your parents until they died only for my three sisters bullying me to get out the house even though they have their own homes and families. Coming down to the house taking some of my things throwing away some of my parents things listening to my telephone messages and ringing my mental health worker. I cannot forgive that sort of behaviour and neither can my legal team you are behind me all the way to get a fair share of my inheritance. If I could overcome it believe me I would but the totally unnecessary pressure put on me by my sisters is uncalled for which is why it is very hard to stand up to the things that are said by them and what they are trying to do with no thought about my welfare or what my parents would have wanted for me.
 

Daphna

Ninja of light
#4
Lucky you but have you been in your family home for 59years and looked after as a carer for your parents until they died only for my three sisters bullying me to get out the house even though they have their own homes and families. Coming down to the house taking some of my things throwing away some of my parents things listening to my telephone messages and ringing my mental health worker. I cannot forgive that sort of behaviour and neither can my legal team you are behind me all the way to get a fair share of my inheritance. If I could overcome it believe me I would but the totally unnecessary pressure put on me by my sisters is uncalled for which is why it is very hard to stand up to the things that are said by them and what they are trying to do with no thought about my welfare or what my parents would have wanted for me.
Wow what a lovely soul you have. Your parents did a fine job in raising you. I wish more people would take care of their ailing folks as you did in your self-sacrificing love. You didn't hesitate to take on this honorable duty either I bet. My heart goes out to you in your pain. Your sisters are falsely accusing your character because you did the right thing. It hurts; no doubt. But this trial will eventually end, and someday they will see how greed had changed their principles and characters towards you and they will feel shame. Even if they deny it to death; they will. I am sure your parents raised them better than that seeing they did so with you. Am I right? Money and worldly possessions can change people. As you well know it's ugly. But is that who they truly are or who they choose to be by the greed they give into?

Anger is a natural backlash to pain. Everyone does it, but your tender soul is suffering terribly from it because it goes against who you are. It's a war I have faced as well. Anger, hurt and rage. And it poisoned my character for so long that I couldn't recognize myself. I hated who I allowed myself to become, and I wanted to die. Which wasn't right and I knew it. It tore me away from my family, and those I deeply cared about. All in all it was ruining my life.

As I have said before in other posts. Forgiving isn't for them. It's for you. To break the chains that hold YOU down. To end the suffering that it causes YOU. I am confident that your parents would be ashamed of this whole situation if they were still alive. They like most parents; wanted to give financial help to their children when they pass. Not to tear the family apart by the greed displayed today. Does it make you weak by staying true to their teaching by forgiving your sisters gross behavior? I would say it makes you incredibly strong and wise. Doing the right thing on your part is something you can control. We cannot control others. They have to learn on their own, and they will by you. Over time.

I only talk to you like this because you seem like a genuine caring woman. One that can be reasoned with. My advice is optional of course, and it may take time to accomplish. There is no magic wand that *poof* all goes away. That isn't what I say at all. I apologize to any who get that impression. It takes effort and the choice to stay true to oneself and your convictions. I refuse to believe that someone as caring as you would normally act this way under normal circumstances. It just doesn't fit with what you have shared about yourself. So what's holding you back?
 
#5
Thank you, I am sure that my parents would have been devastated if they had known that my sisters would behave like they are doing, my mother was aware that one sister is very dominant but that sister promised to my dying mother that she would make sure I would be alright. As I am the youngest and had rather a sheltered life through suffering from depression two of my sisters have been very jealous and now feel I have no rights I just they could look at the situation and say 'There but for the grace of God that it is not me'. It is heart breaking that they cannot accept how hard it is for me and help rather than criticise.
 

Daphna

Ninja of light
#6
Thank you, I am sure that my parents would have been devastated if they had known that my sisters would behave like they are doing, my mother was aware that one sister is very dominant but that sister promised to my dying mother that she would make sure I would be alright. As I am the youngest and had rather a sheltered life through suffering from depression two of my sisters have been very jealous and now feel I have no rights I just they could look at the situation and say 'There but for the grace of God that it is not me'. It is heart breaking that they cannot accept how hard it is for me and help rather than criticise.
I do sympathize my friend. I used to suffer bipolar attacks. It prevented me from ever being able to hold down a job and relationships. But I no longer suffer from them, and now life is on the up and up. Don't give up hope and if you are a spiritual woman, (don't want to assume either way), keep praying for them to wake up from these hateful thoughts and beliefs. Sounds like legally you have it covered, and my hope is that one day they humble themselves towards you and apologize for these selfish childish behaviors. :hug:
 
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