Ever since I was a child I have had strange reactions to several situations that don't seem to even be noticed my most people. I have irrational attachments to inanimate objects. I get very anxious and afraid at certain sounds or sudden movements. I have certain.. ticks.. where I get obsessively stuck on details like.. I have to touch things in a certain order or.. like.. feel a certain pressure when I'm writing with a pen or even typing on my keyboard.. to the point where I have to delete and type it again with the 'right' pressure because I just can't move forward until I do. If I'm getting an egg out of a carton it will take me minutes to choose which eggs I should take.. like I irrational feel that some eggs should (or want to) go first.. I don't know this all sounds so crazy when I type it out. Anyway.. I'm not much for self diagnosis but after hearing a story about an autistic child last night on a podcast I listen to I recognized a lot of similarities between that child and me as a child and as an adult. I decided to go online and take an autism test.. not like a 15 question generic one but a 50 question one that I had to pay for. When I got the results back my score was on the border between 'borderline/high functioning autistic' and 'Fairly prominent autistic symptoms'. I guess my question is.. what do I do with this information? Should I do anything with it? Does it matter? Is there like.. a different degree of help I'm entitled to if I test as autistic? If I tell my doctor I'm sure she'll react like all medical professionals do to online tests and just roll her eyes and blow it off. But.. I mean.. if I am autistic there should be some studied medical processes that might help me with the effects of living with this right? Or do I just ignore it because.. I've lived my whole life like this anyway and it's not like I'm not used to it.. though.. I find life harder and harder the the older I get.. is there specific help for autistic symptoms that would help my depression or make me feel more human? I just don't know what to do about any of this I guess.. and I'm wondering if anyone here has experience with autism or how to cope with the obsessive compulsiveness that comes with it.. or how to ask a medical professional about it or what to do to help myself in general. Or am I just being stupid and assumptive and trying to find reasons why I'm not good at being a person? Any feedback would be really appreciated.. thanks.