Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by JustWatchMeChange, Sep 11, 2007.

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  1. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    I've been to counseling and have been told this is not about me, but I feel like it is. I mean my wife risked so much to try and murder me. She made love to me while planning my murder. My mind knows she is sick and twisted, but my heart has been ripped apart. Sometimes I wish she had succeeded. My life was a joke. I thought I was special to someone, but it was all a lie. All she wanted was the money I was making. Now I can't even do that. I feel like such a fool. I hate betrayal and I hate every minute of life. I still have hope for the future, but the distant future. For now, I have to hang on and fight. But I wonder if I can ever trust again. I want to go home and be with God so bad, but I'm sure He wants me here for my kids and so do I. But there is so little left of me that I am useless to them. I can't even keep a job. I did not even pray about marrying her so I deserve all of this, but my kids don't.
  2. Blackness

    Blackness Guest

    What a bitch, seriously.
    hope you werent hurt! people are so selfish and being lied to /played with is the most hurtful thing out there.

  3. Trip the Dark fantastic

    Trip the Dark fantastic Well-Known Member

    Are you in counselling because you survived an attempt on your life by your partner/wife or might it be in your mind and you are proactively dealing with it by being counselled?

    These are cryptic statements you make and I for once would need to know from what angle you are coming from and what kind of help you think might benefit you.

  4. JustWatchMeChange

    JustWatchMeChange Well-Known Member

    No, it really happened. She was adding all kinds of contaminated crap to my dinners and wanted to give me botchalism. What I mean about praying is as a Christian I should have sought God's will in selecting my wife and I did not. I have been counseled, but I probably should get more. And no, I was not hurt and thankfully neither were my kids.
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