I really feel today like I'd be better off dead. I have so much I'm burdened by. Debt, joblessness, external and internalized transphobia, depression, childhood trauma, loneliness, it just goes on and on. How much is too much? It's more than I can handle and I'm helpless to do anything about any of it. I don't see any way out of all this other than death. The only things keeping me alive are guilt and survival instinct. I wish I could just close my eyes and die.
