Following a build up of stress, anxiety and depression for years, after suffering the consequences of redundancy, 6 months ago I had my first counselling session with a therapist. He was gentle and kind, good listener but did not give anything, no challenge. He would repeat "and how does that make you feel?" which seemed like a typical piss-take phrase of those who mock the profession. Kind but not challenging, gentle but not stimulating my thoughts enough to make me wish to go back. Then I saw a psychotherapist, a woman who I have been seeing for the last four months. During my first session with her I did burst into tears, it was so bloody embarrassing crying in front of an absolute stranger. However, I could see that she got me right way, she understood certain things about me without me even saying them during out first session. Although I did not feel completely comfortable with her, I decided to get counselling from her. Now, following very recent unlucky, life-altering events I can no longer afford her, thus I temporarily suspended the sessions. Which is ironic because right now I need it so badly, more so than ever before. My question is: does counselling really help? Does it change you? Do counsellors/psychotherapist really give a shit? How do you know if your counsellor/therapist is a good one? At times I had doubt about the therapist lady I saw for 4 months. I felt judged, which is not what someone with trust issues like me wants nor needs. I remember on the very last session I had with her, in the context of my trust issues topic and people, she used a word to describe my behavior which isn't exactly flattering: formidable. Also using a cat analogy, when cats are scared, they arch up and hiss at you to scare you away. I mean, was this a good therapist? When I communicated with her my recent job loss, she suggested for me EMDR therapy as an additional one I would possibly benefit from. I had to spell it out for her that I was about to loose my job hence could not afford any type of therapy. How do you know when a therapist has your best interest at heart? A month ago I got very pissed at her because she disrupted (however briefly) my session to pick up a delivery downstairs. I read on a number of reviews from different sites that what she did on that occasion was a clear sign of a bad therapist. I am confused. If they are supposed to be mental health professionals with the purpose to help others, then why is it I find the whole psychotherapy/counselling deal an utter BS? Some of them fees are an absolute joke. Anyone has an insight on good and bad counsellors/therapists to shed a light on please?