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Ideas & Opinions CBT worksheet self help.

FlamingoWrangler

🦩🦩🦩🦩
#5
I managed to successfully (Abeit with sub par social skills) attend a non work related social event on Saturday 10th Dec.
This is was a huge step for me as in truth I currently don't really have a social circle.
I am hopefully / planning on going to another this week to continue the progress.
Congrats to you!
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#6
Feel like I've hit wall with this project - I've managed to attend 2 events now but still really struggling with interactions. Last two events were bar/club type venue and this maybe wasn't ideal as - noisy, expensive, 50% people drunk.
I going to try an attend a cinema club next week which might make a difference. However I'm worried I'm not making significant progress.
 

Waves

Well-Known Member
#7
I've been creating/filling CBT worksheet (Trigger events, response in columns) for the
past 2-3 weeks or so to cope with recurring GAD.

Hoping to practice breathing & mediation exercise beginning this weekend.

Is anyone else currently engaging something similar?
Yes tried it. I found I can do everything I can but I can’t make nice safe people appear in my life.
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#8
WARNING - LONG POST AHEAD!!​

MAY CONTAIN PRETENTIOUS SELF REFLECTIONS! ​

I've been continuing to motivate /urge myself to go to at least some social events for the past couple of months and managed to go restaurant and cinema - both of which I would usually avoid due to anxiety.
However I've not been developing any friendships in the course of these and it's really distressing me.
I've depressed about his since going to cinema on Friday and considered the following:

At work:
  • I (colleagues have told me this in every job I've held) come across as cold and aloof.
  • I've been routinely warned about having poor communication skills.
  • I essentially got fired from my last job for "inability to build relationships" with clients.
  • Currently I've no social circle.
During education:
  • This was the only time in my life I had something akin to a social circle and even then we rarely interacted at all outside of college.
During childhood:
  • I had no friends at all in secondary school and went home at lunch to avoid being alone for an hour
My conclusion is that as my anxiety/inability to go to events is no longer a factor maybe my efforts should be reassessing and developing my social skills as they are clearly lacking.

I really think I should look into psychotherapy - It would be a financial hit but it might be necessary as my deficiencies seem very pervasive and I seem unable to make progress by myself.
I watched this video recently and I'm scared the second case might be me if I don't do something:
 

Innocent Forever

πŸ’πŸ₯œπŸŒ
Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#9
WARNING - LONG POST AHEAD!!​

MAY CONTAIN PRETENTIOUS SELF REFLECTIONS! ​

I've been continuing to motivate /urge myself to go to at least some social events for the past couple of months and managed to go restaurant and cinema - both of which I would usually avoid due to anxiety.
However I've not been developing any friendships in the course of these and it's really distressing me.
I've depressed about his since going to cinema on Friday and considered the following:

At work:
  • I (colleagues have told me this in every job I've held) come across as cold and aloof.
  • I've been routinely warned about having poor communication skills.
  • I essentially got fired from my last job for "inability to build relationships" with clients.
  • Currently I've no social circle.
During education:
  • This was the only time in my life I had something akin to a social circle and even then we rarely interacted at all outside of college.
During childhood:
  • I had no friends at all in secondary school and went home at lunch to avoid being alone for an hour
My conclusion is that as my anxiety/inability to go to events is no longer a factor maybe my efforts should be reassessing and developing my social skills as they are clearly lacking.

I really think I should look into psychotherapy - It would be a financial hit but it might be necessary as my deficiencies seem very pervasive and I seem unable to make progress by myself.
I watched this video recently and I'm scared the second case might be me if I don't do something:
Hey, therapy can be really helpful... you've got this!
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#10
Hi

Back after 3 month absence.
Finally booked a session with a private psychotherapist for next Friday.
I hope to go for a minimum of 3 sessions and see what the treatment/plan , prognosis etc.

I've been reading some of the therapy posts on the forum to remind myself of to expect - they've been helpful.

I plan to maybe report on progress here - if nothing else as a tool for myself.
I'm currently writing bullet point lists for the topics
as I know I will struggle to explain to the therapist otherwise.

Any advice would be welcome especially from members
receiving treatment for anxiety disorders or cluster C
personality disorders.
 
#11
I've received treatment for anxiety. One thing I do throughout the day is a "grounding" exercise where I feel my feet on the ground (can be done barefoot on grass but anywhere is fine), think about my connection to the earth and take a few deep breaths. I love this because it's so simple and easy, yet proven to lower cortisol.

Youtube has some great stuff for anxiety - check out Therapy in a Nutshell. I also like the following

 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#12
Back - today at least
  • I've been seeing my/the psychotherapist approx. bi weekly.
  • I've managed to go to weekly class - which has so far been my biggest achievement.
  • Finally actually meet people at some the meetup/events I've gone to instead of avoiding.
  • Went to a gig - (I really regret on missing out on them during my teenage/early twenties)

Still a lot of frustration centered around lots of missed opportunities from not dealing with my problems earlier. Particularly depressed today.
 
#13
I'm sorry that you're feeling so bad. I'm glad you've been working at trying to get better though.
Any advice would be welcome
There may be something in these two links that could help:

Chinese Herbal Medicine and Acupuncture, World's Second Largest Medical System

Self-Treatment and Miscellaneous

Dietary changes were very helpful for me with social anxiety. It doesn't really make sense that it would help, but it did. There's a section on dietary changes in the self-treatment link.
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#14
Trying to restart this thread in order to help my own progress:

Good things/progress so far:

1. One of the events I proposed in the rock/alt music meetup I joined got 3 to attend. It also meant I
wasn't completely alone in the build up to new year.
2. I have another new art course starting in February.
3. I have got my therapists to refocus attention on improving social skills/participation.

Set backs /concerns:

1. Late December was extremely bad due to most of my outlets being on hiatus and living
alone highlighting my loneliness, which resulted in bad insomnia.
2. Still strugglingly with actual interaction at events. Trying to make some tangible goals each week for this.
3. hope to take up running as a new year resolution.
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#15
This week summary:

Good things/progress so far:

1. Trying to set ambitious goal of suggesting people meetup outside at next gig/concert - meetup.
2. Classes starting again within the next two weeks.
3. Restarted goal setting.
4. Told by therapist that I wanted to returned to more goal oriented + CBT style sessions
as it has proven the most useful thus far.
5. Achieved all 4 of minor social interaction/interpersonal goals for this week
and have set 4 more.

Set backs /concerns:

1. Might have to wait till next weekend to get proper runners (Sneakers for the Americans) due to money.
Concerned I might keep using as an excuse to put off joining running.
2. Work pressures still quite high.
3. Still quite isolated though trying to fill the time a bit better.
 

Atreides

Staff Alumni
SF Supporter
#16
One of my plans for 2024 is to do more mindfulness meditation. I just close my eyes and focus on my breath for at least five minutes. I'm trying to be more in the moment, I even have a clock with no hands. It just says NOW. The purpose is to remind me to be in the moment each time I see it. I also have a NOW watch.
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#18
This week summary:

Good things/progress so far:

1. Classes are back which has lifted my mood.
2. New class starting next Thursday - hope to start on a more ambitious foot socially .
3. Going to suggest yet another event for the meetup group to go to.
4. In my cinema study group two of the films I've suggested have been watched.

Set backs /concerns:

1. Running goal is being put off until new class is started.
2. Work pressures still quite high.
3. Haven't had the opportunity to achieve my previous first goal - but hoping the
event I'm suggesting for next week will help.
 

IRE1992

SF Supporter
#20
I feel like all my efforts thus far have been utterly useless. I've been
unable to sleep due to worrying about what my future will be like
and am sleep deprived as a result. I can't think any reason to continue with life.
 

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