Children think you dont love them if you want to leave we must stay for them

[liveinhope]

life can deal a varied pack of cards to us all but some of us seem to get the whole deck thrown in one go.
Just needing to sound of a bit really im cross today cross at having not been given the chance to do what i had intended, Not with family for finding me but with myself for staying there so they did, that had not been my intention but the meds took over the decision making.
im having to look at their faces every day with the why? question clearly written on them dont you love us enough??

Of course i love them i have raised them and adored them all of their lives but they cant understand that can be if im still wanting to leave.

For all those feeling this way i totally understand but i also know we have to try to stay if we can

 

[gentlelady]

Did you set them down and talked with them about what has happened? I know it is hard to admit things like this to your children, but it may help them to understand that it wasn't them you didn't love. It was not to escape from them. I am sorry you all are having to deal with this. There are no real answers, no easy way out. I hope you can help them to understand your pain and maybe help to support you through it. Take care Dawn and I am glad you are still here. :hug:

 

[theleastofthese]

my daughter is afraid to leave me alone for fear I will kill myself. what a load of guilt that puts on me and makes me wish more than ever that I were dead. kids just don't understand what it takes out of a person to be a parent - and they won't undrstand it unless and until they ecome parents themselves. so there's no explaining it to them as they just can't understand what you're saying. it's such a load of guilt - to me - to want to kill myself over my failures and such, when i think of what it may do to the kids... if they'd even notice, that is.

 

[liveinhope]

Thanks
No i havent been able to explain but i know ium going to have to its all a bit to raw just now

 

[liveinhope]

thanks for replying i dont think children can completely understand my therapist that is visiting at home hasoffered to talk to them i think i may let her take care

 

[gentlelady]

I think that is a very good idea Dawn. Your therapist will know what to do with the various reactions they might have and how to answer questions you may not feel stong enough to answer. I wish you well when they are talked to. Continue to fight Dawn. You are well worth it. :hug:

 

[liveinhope]

Im Trying To Keep Up The Fight Its Hard

 

[gentlelady]

I know you are fighting for all it's worth. I have faith in you that you will overcome this in time. It is hard work and doesn't happen as fast as we would like. Have patience, you can get there. :hug:

 

[liveinhope]

not sure i will

 

[gentlelady]

You will. I have confidence in you. :hug: