Contacting a job you've previously declined

[puffymilk]

So around April this year I actually was so close in getting a brand new job. It was pretty much the perfect job for me; same field of work, but at the time I only had to handle one area whilst at my (at the time) current job I had to handle several areas, remote, and of course, most importantly, bigger pay. I hate having to commute every day so yeah it was perfect. But when I was so close in getting it, I had an impostor syndrome, and I was a bit pissed that they didn't reply promptly to my request in rescheduling an interview (such a petty thing I kinda regret it). They eventually rescheduled my interview but I told them I had to withdraw and I told them that it was because of the communication problem. I was in a comfortable position at (at the time) my current job but turns out everything went shit after I declined that job. I regret it so much. I knew damn well I was going to get the job because the CEO and the HR person liked me and I was vibing with them, y'know? They wanted me so bad and when I sent them an email that I had to withdraw they tried calling me several times but I didn't pick it up because first, impostor syndrome, and I was like, well I've explained to them through email why should I bother talking to them again. I wish I could go back in time and continue with the recruitment process and now maybe I'll be employed living a comfortable life.

I was thinking of contacting them again asking if there's any opportunities available but I'm scared that they'll get petty about it. Like, ahaha, look at her crawling back to us! It's kinda embarrassing but I guess you'll never know until you try. I'm also worried that maybe they'll give me another chance, but what if they make the recruitment process difficult because they want to mess with me?

Not really sure what to do.

 

[may71]

I was thinking of contacting them again asking if there's any opportunities available but I'm scared that they'll get petty about it. Like, ahaha, look at her crawling back to us!

As long as you can stomach a negative response from them, there's really no harm in trying. Maybe things will work out.

 

[puffymilk]

As long as you can stomach a negative response from them, there's really no harm in trying. Maybe things will work out.

Thanks. I'm gonna try next week.

 

[Kiwi2016]

I agree with @may71... and sending you positive wishes. And remember if it doesn't work out (we are so often our worst critics) be gentle on yourself and see it as a learning experience for the next opportunity. Sending s.

 

[BarryW]

I have been there before -- passing up an almost guaranteed new job, then the job I stayed at started falling apart. It was worse and worse until I quit. Then I felt I may have made a mistake in passing up that other opportunity. But I try to tell myself there's no way to know how a job will go -- unless you catch me on my more cynical days, when I would say every job will go bad if you wait long enough.

I think these days HR in general is happy for someone to be interested in a job or company, even if it ends up not being a fit. As long as you ask if they still have a need for someone with your skills in a respectful way, I don't think you risk losing anything.

 

[Lady Wolfshead]

I agree you should try contacting them again. The worst thing that could happen is that they won't have a job or won't be open to you again, so it's not like you have something to lose. Good luck!

 

[LumberJack]

I think imposter syndrome is real and all of us have it. Don’t let the fear of success get in your way. I feel like I don’t know what I’m doing more than half the time to say the least.

My way of handling this is to cry. A lot. And then I get back to work. If you’re not making mistakes, you’re not learning anything.

I aspire to know what I am good at, and to know what I want to do. It sometimes helps to know that most everyone else doubts their own competence at times. And those who don’t? They are probably arrogant SOBs who don’t really know half the crap they claim to.

I don’t know if that company will be receptive to you, but if you are interested it can’t hurt to try. Worst case is they say no, which is where you are now.

 

[puffymilk]

@Kiwi2016 @BarryW @Lady Wolfshead @LumberJack thank you so much for all the great advices and comforting messages! Really appreciate it. I tried emailing the HR on Friday and for some reason I got that mailer daemon (email did not delivered) thing. I thought that he might not work there anymore, but I checked on his LinkedIn that he still is working there. So I think I'm going to message him on LinkedIn (we are connected there).

I also got 2 interview opportunities but I'm not sure about the jobs

 

[BarryW]

Alright, thanks for keeping us posted. If you can't get in touch with the specific HR member you spoke with before, check the company website, and it should have some way to contact the company (maybe on a 'careers' page or 'about us' page). You can also start guessing emails like 'hr@' company's domain.

 

[BarryW]

I also got 2 interview opportunities but I'm not sure about the jobs

Interviews are a great chance for you to ask all your questions about the company or position. Bring your questions and concerns and address them!

 

[Kiwi2016]

Keeping you in my thoughts! Good luck with the interviews...always a good chance to explore other options and good practice too....

 

[puffymilk]

I finally had enough courage to send the message to the job I previously declined. So we'll see.

 

[Survivorist]

I would not contact them remotely - would simply go there and if possible talk in person. This is always better. If you can handle this, great.

 

[puffymilk]

I would not contact them remotely - would simply go there and if possible talk in person. This is always better. If you can handle this, great.

This is a remote job, and they don't have a physical office, so this is the best way to contact them and thank you

 

[puffymilk]

The HR person has read my message on LinkedIn but hasn't replied. I got scared and turned the notification off. Haha.

 

[BarryW]

What's to be afraid of? You already don't work there.. they can't take that away.
I hope you can find the courage to check it at some point.

 

[UrbanRose]

So around April this year I actually was so close in getting a brand new job. It was pretty much the perfect job for me; same field of work, but at the time I only had to handle one area whilst at my (at the time) current job I had to handle several areas, remote, and of course, most importantly, bigger pay. I hate having to commute every day so yeah it was perfect. But when I was so close in getting it, I had an impostor syndrome, and I was a bit pissed that they didn't reply promptly to my request in rescheduling an interview (such a petty thing I kinda regret it). They eventually rescheduled my interview but I told them I had to withdraw and I told them that it was because of the communication problem. I was in a comfortable position at (at the time) my current job but turns out everything went shit after I declined that job. I regret it so much. I knew damn well I was going to get the job because the CEO and the HR person liked me and I was vibing with them, y'know? They wanted me so bad and when I sent them an email that I had to withdraw they tried calling me several times but I didn't pick it up because first, impostor syndrome, and I was like, well I've explained to them through email why should I bother talking to them again. I wish I could go back in time and continue with the recruitment process and now maybe I'll be employed living a comfortable life.

I was thinking of contacting them again asking if there's any opportunities available but I'm scared that they'll get petty about it. Like, ahaha, look at her crawling back to us! It's kinda embarrassing but I guess you'll never know until you try. I'm also worried that maybe they'll give me another chance, but what if they make the recruitment process difficult because they want to mess with me?

Not really sure what to do.

That's really a tough spot to be in. I'ld fully agree with you that they might resent that you didn't take the opportunity back when it was offered. I also fully understand the disappointment you feel in yourself.

I had an experience where I left a job very soon after getting it because another offer came that I thought was better. It wasn't. So I called the first place and asked if they'ld let me start with them again. They weren't mean in how they talked to me, but their answer was a definite "no." It was along the lines of how they felt I needed to take responsibility for my decision. I humbly expressed regret for leaving them, but their "no" was final.

I'm not sorry I tried to get them to take me back. If I hadn't done that, I'ld have spent years wondering if I could have gotten the job back. Getting told "no" helped me to move on. My request for a second chance was mafe over the phone. If you want to try that employer again, I would suggest writing a letter (on actual paper) saying that you've come to better appreciate the oportunity that their company offers. I wouldn't grovel and sound desperate. I would set an upbeat tone. I'ld say flattering things about their firm and how I'ld be very pleased, if they would consider me again now or in the future. I might finish off, saying I'm grateful for them having considered me favorably in the past and wish them well. At least, that way, I don't think you'ld get a snotty response.

In my case, it was a rather low-skilled, bottom of the totem pole job that made it easy for them to replace me. In your case, it sounds like you actually have some special capabilities that the employer coveted. Getting a response from them - either way - might help you move on with more of a sense of closure. Then, don't despair because it sounds like you do have abilities to offer.

In conclusion, I know how bad it hurts to learn a lesson the hard way. Believe me! Been there, done that . . . way more than once. We don't come into this world full of wisdom. We come in completely stupid. If you have your health, life will give you other opportunities. Some say that good luck is when opportunity knocks on the door of a person who has worked to be prepared for that opportunity. Keep preparing, and stay alert for the next knock. It may be a soft knock, so stay on your toes and keep watching and listening.

 

[puffymilk]

That's really a tough spot to be in. I'ld fully agree with you that they might resent that you didn't take the opportunity back when it was offered. I also fully understand the disappointment you feel in yourself.

I had an experience where I left a job very soon after getting it because another offer came that I thought was better. It wasn't. So I called the first place and asked if they'ld let me start with them again. They weren't mean in how they talked to me, but their answer was a definite "no." It was along the lines of how they felt I needed to take responsibility for my decision. I humbly expressed regret for leaving them, but their "no" was final.

I'm not sorry I tried to get them to take me back. If I hadn't done that, I'ld have spent years wondering if I could have gotten the job back. Getting told "no" helped me to move on. My request for a second chance was mafe over the phone. If you want to try that employer again, I would suggest writing a letter (on actual paper) saying that you've come to better appreciate the oportunity that their company offers. I wouldn't grovel and sound desperate. I would set an upbeat tone. I'ld say flattering things about their firm and how I'ld be very pleased, if they would consider me again now or in the future. I might finish off, saying I'm grateful for them having considered me favorably in the past and wish them well. At least, that way, I don't think you'ld get a snotty response.

In my case, it was a rather low-skilled, bottom of the totem pole job that made it easy for them to replace me. In your case, it sounds like you actually have some special capabilities that the employer coveted. Getting a response from them - either way - might help you move on with more of a sense of closure. Then, don't despair because it sounds like you do have abilities to offer.

In conclusion, I know how bad it hurts to learn a lesson the hard way. Believe me! Been there, done that . . . way more than once. We don't come into this world full of wisdom. We come in completely stupid. If you have your health, life will give you other opportunities. Some say that good luck is when opportunity knocks on the door of a person who has worked to be prepared for that opportunity. Keep preparing, and stay alert for the next knock. It may be a soft knock, so stay on your toes and keep watching and listening.

thank you so much for this! Thanks for sharing your experience. This is kinda like, my first starting time of being an adult and being in an actual working field so I don’t know much about it. At least I’ve tried asking them so I can stop wondering and move on. Trying to convince myself that anything’s possible and there will be more opportunities. I guess I just have to be patient.

 

[puffymilk]

Okay so, some update: the CEO of the job I contacted responded and I think he is open to hiring me! He only has asked me 2 questions so far: 1) what is my current availability (for the interview)? 2) how soon can I join them after the interview? I told him I would be available for an interview on Monday and I'll have a 2-week notice before I can join them. He has not responded yet. I think my answers are pretty normal?

I will also have another interview tomorrow online at 3pm (my time). I haven't confirmed it yet because I'm a bit nervous (and possibly impostor syndrome), but I will most likely do it.

 

[1Lefty]

That sounds promising, I wish you the best
When I was working, a 2-week notice to the current employer was understandable and generally expected
I don't know if that's still true
I hope your online interview goes well, too

peace