Dad...I wish you were still here.

Discussion in 'Grief and Bereavement' started by Lonely26, Apr 24, 2015.

  1. Lonely26

    Lonely26 Member

    My dad passed away a few months ago. He had a heart attack. No one was home when it happened and sometimes i wonder maybe if i was there i might have been able to help him. Instead when i got home and went to check on him i knew instantly he was gone. Now all i want is to have him back. It just hurts too much sometimes, its a suffocating knot in my chest that never goes away.
  2. Lastnight

    Lastnight Active Member

    My condolences for your loss - may he rest in peace.

    My father passed several years ago, in an automobile accident - he hit a telephone pole and his vehicle flipped.
    He was still alive on his trip to the hospital, and the Autopsy states that he may have been in the wreckage for up to 3 hours before he was picked up.

    I too wonder, if it was possible for him to have been saved.
    Having lived with him for the majority of nearly two decades, I still haven't gotten used to him not being around in person.

    In times like these, I believe it is important to stick close with your loved ones.
    Treasure the bonds with others you have now, and cherish the memories of your father in the future.
    Please do not hesitate to request more support from us.
  3. mulberrypie

    mulberrypie Well-Known Member

    im so sorry. im sure there aren't words for how youre feeling now. i am here for you if you ever need someone to talk to. hugs
  4. Acy

    Acy Mama Bear - TLC, Common Sense Staff Member Safety & Support

    I'm sorry your dad is gone - losing a loved one is a big loss. :hug: Guilty feelings - "maybe if I was there I might have been able to..." - happen to lots of us. From what you've said, you and your dad loved each other. You cared a lot. Those are the important things. Do you have some special memories of your dad that you could honor or celebrate in some way? Some people light a special candle in memory, or donate to a cause that was important to their loved one.

    I'm so sorry it still hurts so much right now. I think your dad was surrounded by your love - how wonderful that you had each other! The love doesn't "die" - so even while you are hurting, that love is cradling you both. Keep processing your grief. Eventually the good memories don't "hurt" to think about. They just mean that our loved one is still in our hearts. I will be thinking of you. :arms:
  5. DrownedFishOnFire

    DrownedFishOnFire Quieta non movere

    Sorry about your loss. Have you tried looking for extra support through this rough time?
  6. iBananya

    iBananya Member

    So very sorry for your loss :(

    We lost my mother a few years ago, and it was the hardest thing I've ever dealt with in my life. My father is now battling cancer and I am halfway around the world from him, so while the circumstances of both are different, I understand how very hard it is to think of "what if's" and go through the experience of losing someone so dear, someone who was basically the foundation of our lives. It's not easy at all, and we are all here for you! :group hug:

    The easiest thing to think of when we lose someone like that is "what could I have done?" But maybe you will feel much better to focus rather, on the good times, the immense love you shared and the happy memories created over a lifetime :hug: Our parents love us, and want that we enjoy our lives and let them keep living on in us through memories and the lessons they taught us, the foundation they created as they raised us :pinkheart: