Death is only thing I look forward to

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by wastedmylife, Sep 5, 2008.

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  1. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    Not sure what it means but the only thing I look forward to is dying, I am stuck in this depressive misery, then I think about myself dying and I start to feel a little better
     
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I feel the exact same way even though I don't want to actually die, I just want to be happy.
     
  3. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    do you know how you can get happy?
     
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Unfortunately, I don't think anything can make me happy again. The only thing I have left to look forward to is death. While death is the only thing we are looking forward to its kind of impossible to see a bright side, thats why I come here to sf :)
     
  5. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    how old are you, why dont you think you will be happy again
     
  6. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I'm 19! I won't ever be happy again because I have completely isolated myself from the world(stayed in my home for 4+ years). I don't socialize with anybody. SF is my life. I have tried numerous anti-depressants, talked to many psychiatrists. No one can help me. So i guess there's nothing left for me to do except die.
     
  7. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I hope you are kidding , anyway no one can make you happy except for yourself, I dont know what you want out of life but only you have to make that possible, I dont think any shrink or anti depressent can help, maybe a shrink can help, I wish i was 19 again

    have u lived an isolated life or had a rough upbringing
     
  8. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I wish i was kidding:tongue: Yea, I agree with you that only I can make things possible, but I don't know where to even start.

    Strangely, I had a very good upbringing with very loving parents.My dad passed away in June which has worsened my depression a lot.

    Sorry for hijacking your thread:laugh: What makes you feel that you can't be happy? :hug:
     
  9. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I dont know, I suggest you talk to a shrink, as for me ehh thats a long story, I think I am a lost cause
     
  10. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Thanks :)

    Have you tried meds or therapy? :arms:
     
  11. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    yea I tryed all that years ago, real long story I think I am beyond salvable
     
  12. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Do you think its worth another try? Its gotta be better than giving up for good! :hug:
     
  13. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    i dont know i tryed therapy again but that didnt help, and meds are not something I really believe in, I really think I am to 2 far gone, like that other guys user id
     
  14. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Have you tried CBT(cognitive behavioral therapy)?. It's supposed to work really well and completely change your mind set and allows you to see things in a different light. The only reason I haven't tried it is because I don't leave my home.
     
  15. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    I dont know, I dont really trust most therapies especially these fad therapies, I think people need to get over things themselves and deal with things themselves, but I dont rule out therapy in general


    and u havent left your home in 4 years, didnt you go to HS
     
  16. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I understand :) I think its worth looking into though!!

    Yep, I haven't left my home at all since 2004. I left high school when I was 15, I only completed half of high school. Suits me anyway, i hated highschool:laugh:

    It gets lonely at times, especially with no friends or anything, I dont know what I'd do without SF.
     
  17. wastedmylife

    wastedmylife Well-Known Member

    why did u leave HS didnt your parents mind
     
  18. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    I left high school when my anxiety got very bad, I couldn't stand even talking directly to anyone and still cant now. I get extremely paranoid without reason. My parents didn't mind, well there was nothing they could do about it. I kind of feel sorry for my mom having to put up with me every day. I am a real burden to her.
     
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