Hi, not been on for a wee bit as I was busy with work stuff, as most of you will know I don't talk to my suppose to be best friend anymore. I was on a night out tonight and I drove so that I won't drink. This person was there and completely ignored me all night. And to be honest I didn't actually care. I usually would get annoyed and hurt but I kind of learned to ignore them back and try not to let them get to me. But I feel useless and pathetic because at times I was sitting myself with no one to talk to. I got the feeling that I wasn't really wanted there. Then the feelings of patheticness came with urges to cut myself to take the feeling or worthlessness away. I thought I was doing good with my depression but really I think I have been just papering over the cracks and nothing has changed. My mind is racing and can't forget looking back at how sad people would think that I was sitting there alone.