I tried staying positive about finding a counselor/psychologist (or is it psychiatrist? still get those two confused) and did try. Went to a 5th person and was not liking it. Doing it 5 times was hard enough for me, having a social phobia. The saddest part is that the knowledge of having a social phobia doesn't help in the slightest. I really cannot see myself trying a 6th time. I'm expecting to not like the 6th person and on as the first 5 haven't worked out. Or maybe the places will turn me away (one place, not counted among the 5 did) since I'm too screwed up for any help anyways. Or maybe I'm just not comfortable with anyone... I'm just one big lump of a screw-up.