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Feeling everything is out of control

Discussion in 'Suicidal Thoughts and Feelings' started by Mordeci, Jul 31, 2009.

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  1. Mordeci

    Mordeci Banned Member

    I have absolutly no say as to what happens in my life. Everyone but me seems to have imput in my life while I am unable to do anything about it. Nothing I do or say seems to matter to anyone and I remain stuck living by the whims of others. There seems to be no end in sight, my life is complety out of my control and there is no way to change that. It is like I am not even alive, rather just a pawn used for others and I really don't want to go through this anymore.
  2. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    Hi Andrew,

    I'm sorry you're feeling this way. How old are you? Why do you feel you have no control over your life? Who are these people making decisions for you?
  3. Mordeci

    Mordeci Banned Member

    I am 22 years old, I use to be a student but after several suicide attempts I had to take a year off. Right now I am living off my parents and seeing a doctor very regularly. It sounds nice on paper but between the two I have very little say in what happens in my life wheter it is finaical, emotional, or anything else. I have no friends and I can't find a job anywhere. I know they all mean well but I pretty much wake up every morning and try and find a reason not to kill myself. I was able to at first but now the reasons are few and far in between.
  4. Petal

    Petal SF dreamer Staff Member Safety & Support SF Supporter

    :hug: I feel your pain!

    But..remember its only temporary, you'll be back in college before you know it,you'll be free to live your life as you wish.
    Don't end it now, look forward to the future!
  5. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    They are just being overprotective right now Anyway you can look into doing a few courses at college just to keep you busy a few classes that will help you in the long run. Ask your parents about that tell them it is necessary to keep your brain busy and the social aspects will be good for you too.
  6. Mordeci

    Mordeci Banned Member

    I already tried that, my parents are very diffcult to talk to no matter how well they might mean.
  7. total eclipse

    total eclipse SF Friend Staff Alumni

    I am sorry to hear that it is difficult to get parents to hear sometimes to get them to see you are feeling strong enough to try more. I am glad you posted as i see i sometimes do the same to my daughter as i am afraid to let her try again for fear the stress makes her unstable again. All you can do is keep trying to get them to see your strengths and maybe get social worker or therapist to help you get them to see as well Take care keep posting okay.
  8. triggs

    triggs Account Closed

    hi Andrew :hug: i'm sorry things aren't going well for you, but you should understand that people just want to help you :) and that's a good thing. it may take a while, but your life will get back on track and it will get better. unfortunately you have to take the rough with the smoothe, and sometimes there's a lot of rough. i hope things turn out well and soon :heart:
    triggs xx
  9. eggeater

    eggeater Member

    That sounds like my life written right there :sad:
  10. wheresmysheep

    wheresmysheep Staff Alumni

    i'm sorry you feel like this. when you feel like you've lost control its one of the worst things in the world. how are things with the doc? what are they suggesting for you? have you spoke to them about feeling out of control? it sounds like you just need some independence from everything that your currently involved in. a job could help you. but remember your only 22, you can still get your life on track :hug:
  11. Mordeci

    Mordeci Banned Member

    My problems go deeper then just control issues with my family. For my entire life I have had trouble making friends, and I have pretty much been alone for the past 7 years. Beyond that I have a lot of trouble functioning in society, I just don’t see how I will be able to make any progress when every little problem has me contemplating suicide.
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