I feel bad making another thread when I already have a couple, but I feel this may be a better option. I'm sick. I thought I would be okay by yesterday but I just feel bad all over. I called out sick from work. I have gotten nothing done as my apartment is very disorganized. I feel like my finances are not in a good place despite cutting out a lot of needless spending. Not working today will definitely make for a lighter check next week. I hate feeling sick because I suddenly start to question so many things in my life at once.
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Feeling like a failure
- Thread starter sadhart
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Being one day sick is completely ok. Stay in bed for a while, its ok to be angry. For money don't worry too much - there is always a possibility. I only wish that you feel better tomorrow. When I am angry or mad about myself - I always clean the apartment. Its stupid, but clean apartment - cleaner spirit.
Get well. Hug.
Get well. Hug.
My mood tanks (drops) when I am sick. I can relate to questioning more things when I'm sick as well, due to the extra 'free' time if I skip the usual activities like work etc. Poor mood from being sick + thinking about problems more = recipe for disaster. Finally I learned to stop trying to think about important stuff when I'm sick.. not that I can 100% turn it off.
Hoping you feel recovered soon.
Hoping you feel recovered soon.
Oh I really thought maybe, just maybe things would get a little less shitty. But my mother, the immature woman child that she is, comes along and just made things a little harder for me. See, a couple of months ago, she and my cousin decided to get a loan to fix the very ancient and antiquated septic tank at our family's house. That loan had to be in my name. Every month, I get a text saying how the loan is due. This month I got a couple of extra ones until yesterday i got one saying it was due today. I texted her and heard nothing until now, in the middle of the night I get a text from her saying how she can't pay it until the end of the month and "sorry for the inconvenience".
I was pissed and let her know in the text. Between her and my cousin, who is in her 60's but acts like a college dropout with zero intention to do anything worth a damn in her life, it does not make sense how they can be this irresponsible. I can try understanding not paying....things happen. But it's the lack of communication that really angers me. My mother is such a hypocrite and if the roles were reversed she would not be okay with this. So why the hell should I? I took out a personal loan to deal with my own debt to make things a little less stressful. I was proud of myself because the moment the money hit my account, I immediately paid one of those debts. I'm trying to be responsible as best as I can. and then she does this. I feel selfish though feeling angry but what am i supposed to feel? Good? Now I can't sleep and i have to get up for work in less than two hours.
I was pissed and let her know in the text. Between her and my cousin, who is in her 60's but acts like a college dropout with zero intention to do anything worth a damn in her life, it does not make sense how they can be this irresponsible. I can try understanding not paying....things happen. But it's the lack of communication that really angers me. My mother is such a hypocrite and if the roles were reversed she would not be okay with this. So why the hell should I? I took out a personal loan to deal with my own debt to make things a little less stressful. I was proud of myself because the moment the money hit my account, I immediately paid one of those debts. I'm trying to be responsible as best as I can. and then she does this. I feel selfish though feeling angry but what am i supposed to feel? Good? Now I can't sleep and i have to get up for work in less than two hours.
@sadhart I think you are a strong, realistic person. I hope you can make it through the day - maybe you are tired, due to all this shit which lets you not sleep. One thing I learned the hard way (and I am a lot older than you) is: I like helping others and I did it often - as others helped me, when I was in need. But there is a limit to this. And if somebody does not do you good (family or not) I avoid contact or minimize it. You are only responsible for yourself and those you really love and care for.
I completely understand. My husband has heart failure, and is in really rough shape. He had just had a really intense surgery, came home, and went right back in the hospital, by Ambulance. We got the bill while he was still in the hospital. My husband is purposely ignoring the bills. He thinks he will die anyhow, so why pay. This makes me responsible for his debt. It is very shitty thing to do.
No, she isn't exploiting me. As uneasy as I felt when she and my cousin asked me to put this loan in my name. I knew it was something very important as a non working sewage system would have made life difficult for them and my great aunt.
My mother's problem is that she is all about instant gratification and living too much in the present, while ignoring the past and having gthe future on autopilot if that makes sense. A good example of this is her putting gas in the car. She will fill it all the way then proceed to drive and drive and drive and not once at anytime look at the gas guage until it's at the threshold of being empty. If I point it out to her she acts like pissy teenager. But she'll fill it up, then proceed to repeat the sequence of laziness and procrastination all over again. Sorry for the long explanation.
I'm going to give her the money tomorrow as even though I'm angry at her, I'm still concerned about her money situation.
My mother's problem is that she is all about instant gratification and living too much in the present, while ignoring the past and having gthe future on autopilot if that makes sense. A good example of this is her putting gas in the car. She will fill it all the way then proceed to drive and drive and drive and not once at anytime look at the gas guage until it's at the threshold of being empty. If I point it out to her she acts like pissy teenager. But she'll fill it up, then proceed to repeat the sequence of laziness and procrastination all over again. Sorry for the long explanation.
I'm going to give her the money tomorrow as even though I'm angry at her, I'm still concerned about her money situation.
