Lately its been a nightmare to deal with things I really cant cope with college, i've fallen behind on work and have a ton due in soon and its all just adding to the stress of it all. Funnily enough, college is the only thing thats connecting me to any people and if it wasn't for that i'd be pretty screwed. Pleh, I just dont see a way back right now I mean I bad last year and was always told it gets better etc etc, all i've had in the last 5 months is, a girl crush me, lost 4 best mates, and had a family member fall pretty ill. The only good day in my week is friday night, and thats because I get really drunk down the pub with a mate, if he stopped wanting to go i'd have nothing. All thats been going through my head the last few days is suicidal thoughts, stronger now than i've ever had, I can even see myself doing it soon enough because it really feels like theres no one left to talk to. Meh, even writing this I cant gather my thoughts all properly, sorry if any of that sounded a bit weird or anything, I just needed to vent a little.