Practical Advice Group Therapy
- Thread starter IRE1992
- Start date
I have been in both group and individual therapy. The groups are very helpful to me, especially because I get to process with other clients with similar difficulties, as in they “get it.” There’s a collective wisdom that everyone benefits from.
You’re right that it’s intimidating to get started. I felt ashamed going to my first group, like, crap, now everyone is going to think I’m weak or whatever. I’m glad I went anyway. It definitely takes some time to decide if it’s safe for you to open up there; I wouldn’t recommend sharing anything that you aren’t ready to. That said, if you do feel like you fit with the group after a while, then it might be worth trying to open up just a little bit at a time.
Individual therapy is for the more intimate stuff, IMHO. My therapist knows things about me that I had even kept secret from myself, in that I didn’t see what I was doing until I heard myself say it. I’m now more comfortable sharing deep stuff in a group, because I have had those experiences of taking a risk and finding support rather than being looked down on.
You’re right that it’s intimidating to get started. I felt ashamed going to my first group, like, crap, now everyone is going to think I’m weak or whatever. I’m glad I went anyway. It definitely takes some time to decide if it’s safe for you to open up there; I wouldn’t recommend sharing anything that you aren’t ready to. That said, if you do feel like you fit with the group after a while, then it might be worth trying to open up just a little bit at a time.
Individual therapy is for the more intimate stuff, IMHO. My therapist knows things about me that I had even kept secret from myself, in that I didn’t see what I was doing until I heard myself say it. I’m now more comfortable sharing deep stuff in a group, because I have had those experiences of taking a risk and finding support rather than being looked down on.
Oh btw, I noticed that it’s CBT. That’s more of a skills based approach, as in they (usually) talk about the theory to set the stage for presenting a tool of some sort. Then you have “homework” to experiment with using it, and you can say how it went at the next meeting. FWIW, one thing I learned from CBT is that not only are people noticing less of my flaws than I had expected, but they are generally more charitable to me than I am to myself.
The last group therapy I attended was for women with severe abuse histories. It quickly fell apart because the two co-therapists didn't enforce boundaries from the very beginning. As a result, one member angrily attacked another in session one day scaring people like me into leaving. I've never attended group therapy since. I'd say professional leadership from the therapist(s) & establishment/enforcement of group boundaries is key. People have to feel safe in order for anything approaching treatment & healing can be done.
I am sorry to hear about what happened with that group. That is unfortunately a risk when behavioral norms/boundaries are not communicated and then consistently enforced. I would have expected the facilitators to have been more careful given the nature of the population served.
Sometimes deep traumatic wounds predispose someone to have heightened aggression and poor relationship skills. In other words, “hurting people hurt people.” I know that is totally cliché, but it’s also true, net of the exceptions to the rule. sadly the facilitators failed to account for that prior to structuring the group in question.
Sometimes deep traumatic wounds predispose someone to have heightened aggression and poor relationship skills. In other words, “hurting people hurt people.” I know that is totally cliché, but it’s also true, net of the exceptions to the rule. sadly the facilitators failed to account for that prior to structuring the group in question.
Last session was last week:
Some helpful techniques insights for controlling anxieties:
Some that didn't work as well for me:
Would be interested in hearing others views on what has worked for them.
Some helpful techniques insights for controlling anxieties:
- Recognizing and dropping safety behaviors.
- Being more aware of innate self worth or "rights".
- Trying to seize opportunities for to push myself when they arise.
Some that didn't work as well for me:
- Being more aware of physical symptoms of anxiety.
- Breathing exercises - though lack of practice might be to blame.
- Mindfullness themed focus exercises.
Would be interested in hearing others views on what has worked for them.
Breathing exercises combined with mindfulness can serve to slow down the progression of anxiety for me. (I’m agoraphobic) Doing them in my car might mean I put off a panic attack until I get home, rather than having one in public. That’s… not ideal, but still much better than never leaving the house for fear of them.
That, and medicating the hell out of myself in advance if I have no choice but to put myself in a stressful situation, are the only things that have helped at all.
That, and medicating the hell out of myself in advance if I have no choice but to put myself in a stressful situation, are the only things that have helped at all.