I don't know if I hate my life because I'm depressed or if I'm depressed because I hate my life. I would like to make some lifestyle changes, but I am not sure how to pinpoint the problem. I find myself frequently thinking suicidal thoughts. I have also gotten a lot more morbid, which has resulted in a lot of awkward social situations because of my extremely inappropriate comments. This is why I generally try to avoid social activities because I just end up feeling worse afterward. However, distancing myself from people isn't really helping either. I have tried to stop being so morbid, but it is hard to control what I am thinking so the only thing I can do is stay quiet. I do not think I am at the point of committing suicide, but my depression is affecting my productivity, my concentration, and my health. All I think about every day is how much I hate myself. I have not sought professional help because I don't want my family to find out. I brought up the subject once, and they teased me for it instead. It does not help that they occasionally bring it up in front of others in order to embarrass me. They think only ridiculous and overly-dramatic people suffer from depression. Any advice?