Sometimes I wonder if there's anyone out there like me at all..? I mean of course, they're probably hiding from the harsh world like I have been.. (sad laugh). Title says it all. Here's the thing, there's no way I am able to get to know everyone all at once, so I'm going to write some stuff about myself and if we share a lot in common, let me know and we could talk! I am an intense meticulous person. You have been warned. Qualities I value: Honesty, Empathy, Intelligence, Creativity, Fairness, Transparency. Criteria in a friend: the above; someone I could emotionally and intellectually connect with. someone that shares my taste of humour. Goals: - on a lifelong self improvement journey (mostly within) - finding someone to spend the rest of my life with - finding a reason good enough to keep me fighting - deep meaningful relationship Passion: - drawing - philosophy - psychology - nature - games (DIII, HoTS) - read comics - love details - teasing Traumas: - childhood (to sum it up, my life has been a nightmare since day 1) - family - school - injuries Hates: - media trends - mindless parrots - injustice - abuse of power - physical contact with most people - my stupid mistakes, feeling dejected. Records: - crime: zero - drugs: zero - cigarette: zero - alcohol: hahahaha never tasted. - swearing: once upon a time, I was so pure but then I found the internet. yes, I swear a lot holycow. sheep. duck. crab. sweetbabypotatoes. it's bbq time. - physical self harm: nope. I punish myself in other ways. - p-rnography: pfftt. sex-repulsed outside my subject of interest. Records: So clean it's suspicious? haha. Serious. Orientation: Demisexual Ever question if you're really depressed or just constantly involved with bad people and bad events? Because when you think of it that way, pain is a given, and grieving is only a natural process to heal. and perhaps you're not mentally ill, maybe the world around you is. For five years, I believed I was clinically depressed and misdiagnosed as bipolar2. But after reading more, I begin to doubt if I was even depressed at all. My emotions are always within reason, they don't swing out of nowhere. I don't put myself in "trouble". Meanwhile, depression and bp2 describe otherwise. Mental illness: a medical condition where chemical imbalance in the brain is present, resulting in less dopamine production. Crazy huh? I grew up thinking depression simply meant severe sadness. Hey the more you know! So the world beat you real hard and then you fall apart, You screamed as the tears kiss your cheeks, drop out of school, live in seclusion, insomnia, wanting to disappear. Next thing you know, You're the "weird one". Seem familiar? I'm sure most of you could relate. PS. My computer died mid-typing this. I was panicking. Thank goodness this forum is awesome, all progress retained. Potential friend/twin out here?