I was molested and raped by a neighbor when I was in grade school. The boy is about 6 years older than me, so he was around 10-13 when this was happening. Was he old enough to know what he was doing in the beginning was wrong? Was he old enough to know it wasn't ok? And should I even tell anyone after all these years? Our neighborhood was always a tight nit community, so I never told anyone after I remembered what happened. I had blocked the memory out for many many years. I was afraid to put my grandmother, who I lived with, through the pain of accusing the grandchild of her friend of 30 years, of molestation. I think reporting him would be helpful for myself, but quite useless. It would just be a he said she said, case anyway.
I wouldn't have as much as a problem with it, if he didn't move back in next door my junior year of highschool. He would still give me looks, sexual gestures, and stare and laugh at me constantly. A stupid smug grin. I just don't know what to do anymore. I hate that I feel selfish for wanting to tell someone in my family, when I know it would just bring them considerable pain. They would assume it's their fault, and they should have known about it, and stopped it all.
I wouldn't have as much as a problem with it, if he didn't move back in next door my junior year of highschool. He would still give me looks, sexual gestures, and stare and laugh at me constantly. A stupid smug grin. I just don't know what to do anymore. I hate that I feel selfish for wanting to tell someone in my family, when I know it would just bring them considerable pain. They would assume it's their fault, and they should have known about it, and stopped it all.