Hey gang, I'm new here

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Hi everybody, I guess I'll introduce myself. I'm a 22 year old Canadian woman and have Anxiety and Panic Disorder as well as Depression. I've been suffering form these illnesses ever since I could remember. I live in an abusive home which perpetuates my disabilities with very religious parents. They don't allow me to do anything and are a constant source of pain in my life.

I lead a double life behind their back which is very very stressful and it's very hard to cope. I'm planning on trying to move out soon but I don't know how successful I will be. I've been feeling incredibly depressed and suicidal lately and nothing has been of much help.

I've been on over 10 types of anti-depressant and other types of mood altering medications, none of which have worked. I always experience the side effects very intensely so I just get sick because of them.

I'm almost near graduation from university but I've fallen very behind in my studies because of my suicidal thoughts, depression and anxiety. I've decided to join this community to maybe get some support from people who understand what it's like to be suicidal rather than a doctor or helpline operator.

I'm willing to share my experiences with you all because I've always wondered if there was someone out there with a similar situation as me. So far, I'm the only person I know who is in this type of mess so it's hard to get support.

Thanks for reading

 

[total eclipse]

Hi just want to welcome you to SF and glad to see you reaching out here for help
Can you talk to a coucellor at your university see what can be done to lessen your work load to make sure you do not fall any further in your studies hugs to you

 

[Stormrider]

Hey :welcome: to the forum

"parents. They don't allow me to do anything and are a constant source of pain in my life." Living with people you don't get along with is very hard, especially if you're not feeling good about other things too.
Try to hang on to those studys and then move out when you have a job.
You might feel a lot better if you have a place where you can relax without other people to irritate you.

Offcourse it's easier said then done, but it's the only advice i can give.
Feel free to throw your feelings on this forum, it helps sometimes.

 

[PandorasToybox]

Hey, welcome to SF!!

I can relate to being a post-secondary student & the pressures that come along with it. Lack of support can make for a rough-time but you'll find lots of supportive friends here

Feel free to drop me a message anytime!

 

[BornFree]

Hiya

Welcome to SF! :flowers:

I'm a bit older and have flunked my course now after an attempt and stay in hosp and still struggling with suicidal thoughts. You are not alone. Hope you soon feel at home and supported.

Your home life sounds tough, home is meant to be a sanctuary and a refuge, so it can't be easy. Hope things improve for you soon!

Take care
Hugs
Ditsy

 

[Petal]

Hi and welcome to the forums :welcome: