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How Are You Feeling Right Now?
- Thread starter UNREGISTERED0000
- Start date
lonely
not for people in general, but for the one special person that turned my world upside down (in the best way) when we met. But then it was turned upside down, in the worst way when she died. There is a vacancy that no one else can fill, nothing can compensate for.
This time of year was special for us. I miss sharing it with her, and the spark of life and sense of purpose I had. Now I feel lifeless. much of the time, without purpose. Taking one day as it comes, kind of in survival mode. I've been here before, often, and I know tomorrow or the next day will be better, but the now is really unpleasant
On my good days, I can savor the memories, as bittersweet as they are. Today isn't one of those
peace
not for people in general, but for the one special person that turned my world upside down (in the best way) when we met. But then it was turned upside down, in the worst way when she died. There is a vacancy that no one else can fill, nothing can compensate for.
This time of year was special for us. I miss sharing it with her, and the spark of life and sense of purpose I had. Now I feel lifeless. much of the time, without purpose. Taking one day as it comes, kind of in survival mode. I've been here before, often, and I know tomorrow or the next day will be better, but the now is really unpleasant
On my good days, I can savor the memories, as bittersweet as they are. Today isn't one of those
peace
Maybe one day you can find somebody, or someone, who will not take the place of her--because she is irreplacable--but perhaps they can at very best, or worst, (not necessarily, as you say: "fill the void," either...) make-up for some of that. The absence, and the lonliness, and the sadness with which you feel. You may not be able to feel it now, or even in the very near future.
But there may come a time, when you are ready, and that person comes into your life, and the time is just right, to take a chance on that which could make things a whole lot better than they are now. Again, not wipe-away anything, or engage in any sort of (unfair) comparison - b/c it is unlikely that anyone will ever live up to that (given how much they meant to you).
Though, we don't always need to hit the home-runs, or win the power ball/lottery. Sometimes, we can (not settle; but accept & admire) learn to appreciate, and to respect what we do have, and what is possible--as opposed to what we don't, and what isn't. Or you can feel & be 1000% entitled to disagree, vehemently I might add! And I'd take zero exception, or offense~ (for I am not You/& I have not lived through what you've been through). : ) Just (merely) trying to lend a "helping hand!" Peace, B~
Post: If lonliness, in & of itself; & that is to say - on the surface - is not the problem/or the issue. . . then there is still this sense of 'yearning,' for a special connection that is missing. I'm reminded of the old saying, "Whether you think, I can't or I can't... either way, you're probably right." :^) And that's not an, "I told you so," or any-thing.
But there may come a time, when you are ready, and that person comes into your life, and the time is just right, to take a chance on that which could make things a whole lot better than they are now. Again, not wipe-away anything, or engage in any sort of (unfair) comparison - b/c it is unlikely that anyone will ever live up to that (given how much they meant to you).
Though, we don't always need to hit the home-runs, or win the power ball/lottery. Sometimes, we can (not settle; but accept & admire) learn to appreciate, and to respect what we do have, and what is possible--as opposed to what we don't, and what isn't. Or you can feel & be 1000% entitled to disagree, vehemently I might add! And I'd take zero exception, or offense~ (for I am not You/& I have not lived through what you've been through). : ) Just (merely) trying to lend a "helping hand!" Peace, B~
Post: If lonliness, in & of itself; & that is to say - on the surface - is not the problem/or the issue. . . then there is still this sense of 'yearning,' for a special connection that is missing. I'm reminded of the old saying, "Whether you think, I can't or I can't... either way, you're probably right." :^) And that's not an, "I told you so," or any-thing.
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I did a couple of hours work. Work is via a webpage and none of it is saved until you submit it to the system, no save as you go along. They've been known to foul up when you click submit, resulting in loss of hours of work. I double checked the site was up in another tab, braced myself, and hit Submit. It went through - so am relieved after all the effort that went into it 😊 I do hope it made sense!!
My pharmacy screwed me again and I can't get my benzo for a few more days. If I knew that, I would have made it last, but their website said the 4th it was supposed to be refilled, so I went by that information. And now I'm fucked and anticipating withdrawal soon. My bank also screwed me and won't let me take my money out. What more would you like to throw at me? It seems that my regular daily misery is not enough.
Hi @MisterBGone - Firstly, I agree with what you've written. 
Secondly, I appreciate the time and thought that you put into writing it
peace
Secondly, I appreciate the time and thought that you put into writing it
peace
