• IMPORTANT ANNOUNCEMENT: Please read THIS THREAD about a rebrand for SF.

How Are You Feeling Right Now?

1964dodge

Has a monkey as a friend
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
A lot of things really, but above all else, very deeply grateful for everyone and everything that has ever been “good and right” in my life, and in a way even some of the more “challenging” people and things too because of the invaluable lessons I have learned from those experiences.

It has been a challenging last few weeks for me. I had heavy bleeding (related to my menstral “cycle” even though it has never been regular) and ended up going to the hospital to see what could be done about it. They prescribed me some pills to take when it was really heavy like that, then I was able to get in quickly for a pelvic ultrasound. After that my doc also wanted me to get a blood test to make sure it wasn’t anything to do with that.

Finally, on Monday (a week ago today, it was on the 12th) I went to my doc and he told me I had uterine fibroids. Now I am waiting to be able to see a gynecologist to discuss options about “what to do about them” but won’t even have the appointment for a couple weeks still. Once I get the appointment then it probably won’t be for at least a couple months from now. I am just really hoping in the next couple months that there won’t be a lot more of those “heavy bleeding” days, it is very stressful dealing with that. It’s making me worry about going out (having to “walk” everywhere and all) so ya it is making things very challenging for sure. Still, it has actually made some very positive things happen in terms of my family. They are finally seeming to make a real, sincere and caring effort to me, guess all it took was a potentially life-threatening thing happening to me, yet my many years of struggling with mental health was never addressed with nearly so much love and supportiveness. Ugh. I know we’ve come a long way from even 10-20 years ago in terms of acknowledging “mental health” and the importance of it, but sometimes it definitely still feels like it has a LONG way to go.

Anyway like I said in the first paragraph, despite these challenges, I feel so grateful that the sincere, deep, caring love and support that I’ve always needed so much from my family is finally being truly given to me :)
i hope they can take care of the issues wthout too much discomfort

mike....*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*shake
 

Tor

SF Author
SF Supporter
I’m feeling hopeless and defeated. I’m starting to believe there is no such thing as justice. My livelihood has been infected by harassment in the workplace. I have missed work due to worsened mental conditions, and now my finances are a mess.

There was an investigation regarding this harassment, but nothing has happened. I am expected to directly manage someone that sexually harasses me, and I cannot fathom this reality. It makes me disassociate because I cannot cope. I feel unheard and humiliated.

I fear for my future because every day I work with this jerk, I am a nervous wreck. I need this job, but have nothing left to fight with at this point. This has been occurring for over one year now, and my mental health has never been so degraded.
 

1964dodge

Has a monkey as a friend
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
I’m feeling hopeless and defeated. I’m starting to believe there is no such thing as justice. My livelihood has been infected by harassment in the workplace. I have missed work due to worsened mental conditions, and now my finances are a mess.

There was an investigation regarding this harassment, but nothing has happened. I am expected to directly manage someone that sexually harasses me, and I cannot fathom this reality. It makes me disassociate because I cannot cope. I feel unheard and humiliated.

I fear for my future because every day I work with this jerk, I am a nervous wreck. I need this job, but have nothing left to fight with at this point. This has been occurring for over one year now, and my mental health has never been so degraded.
i'm sorry that your company doesn't take the sexual harassment seriously. one thing you might want to try is everytime it happens write down what happened and when. use the same notebook. eventually the offending party will ask what you're doing. just tell them every time i get sexually harassed you are writing it down in case you have to take legal action. if your employer finds out he will either make sure the harrassment stops or fire you. if he fires you , you will have a good case to sue for a reasonable amount of money. just be cautious

mike...*hug*shake
 

JMG

Pink Sponge Autumn horse 💖🧽🌞🐴
Hey@jmg! I'm really sorry to learn of this condition for you, and after all of the struggles you've been through. I'm just really glad you were able to get in and to get it checked out and are hopefully well on your way to getting it addressed. Also that your family seems to have, turned a/or the corner - with respect to how they view & treat you. Look at you with respect, and so on, and so on. . . And this condition by the way, is not one of the mental make up or type, but rather physical. So it is by no means merely a manifestation of the mind, or an illness that is attributable to the head/brain/or mind - but rather one rooted in medical science. Anyway, I wish you all the best of success with this, and all of the rest, as you go forward and carry ahead. I'm sure you'll have no qualms about, or issues at all whatsoever with facing whatever it is the specialist says, or suggests and recommends for you to do about seeing or seeking a positive resolution to all of this. Scary for sure (though), and in deed! :) Here for, and pulling for you, as always, I hope you do so very well know... Take care and keep on forging ahead, as you always have done in the past, and I have no doubts or concerns about anything with you. For your attitude always has had, and always will have, a positive effect on me, when it comes to inspiration, or one of that which I can aspire to. So thank you once again, @JMG - for the update. And we shall now wish you a fond farewell, or good evening, at the very least! So long, and until next time.
i hope they can take care of the issues wthout too much discomfort

mike....*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*hug*shake
Tysm MBG and Mike, I appreciate your kindness, caring and thoughtfulness very much! *hug*hug

PS - MBG - Ya I am also feeling very glad and grateful about it all being able to be “checked out” fairly quickly, and of course about my fam being more sincere with their support (as opposed to how they have been for years which is mostly a lot of “talk” about “being here for me” yet not really showing it in a real and sincere way, if that makes sense). Thank you so much for all those kind and thoughtful things you said to me about it, and for being so supportive too, wow! 😮 It is deeply appreciated for sure 😊

Same to you in terms of what you said about “feeling inspired” by me and thinking I have a positive attitude, I always admired reading your kind, funny and positive/ great attitude posts too! 😊

Aw you’re so welcome for the update about it all, I wasn’t sure whether it was “tmi” or anything lol, but in case these end up being my last months on this planet then I at least wanted everyone here to have an idea of “what might have happened to me” if I suddenly ended up never posting again or something.

Anyway hopefully that won’t happen of course, just thought it would be helpful to have “an idea” of what’s going on SHOULD the worst happen, especially since I’ve been a member here for almost 14 (!) years lol. Wasn’t always active though and also maybe most people here wouldn’t really notice or care so I just posted it for those who maybe would. Thank you for being one of them, and for caring, you are definitely very rare and priceless! 😊❤️
 

Tor

SF Author
SF Supporter
i'm sorry that your company doesn't take the sexual harassment seriously. one thing you might want to try is everytime it happens write down what happened and when. use the same notebook. eventually the offending party will ask what you're doing. just tell them every time i get sexually harassed you are writing it down in case you have to take legal action. if your employer finds out he will either make sure the harrassment stops or fire you. if he fires you , you will have a good case to sue for a reasonable amount of money. just be cautious

mike...*hug*shake
Thanks for your advice, Mike. I need all the help I can get.

I escalated this issue to the very top of the company, and the investigation has proven nothing so far.

The problem is that I am his boss and have to work with him daily while he continues his actions.

I just want it to stop.
 

JMG

Pink Sponge Autumn horse 💖🧽🌞🐴
I’m feeling hopeless and defeated. I’m starting to believe there is no such thing as justice. My livelihood has been infected by harassment in the workplace. I have missed work due to worsened mental conditions, and now my finances are a mess.

There was an investigation regarding this harassment, but nothing has happened. I am expected to directly manage someone that sexually harasses me, and I cannot fathom this reality. It makes me disassociate because I cannot cope. I feel unheard and humiliated.

I fear for my future because every day I work with this jerk, I am a nervous wreck. I need this job, but have nothing left to fight with at this point. This has been occurring for over one year now, and my mental health has never been so degraded.
Hey Tor, I know we haven’t talked much here but I just wanted to say I’m really sorry you’re having to deal with something like this. I can’t really relate since I have (thankfully) never been sexually harassed and probably never would be anyway (you have to be at least somewhat “attractive” to have that happen I think) but I still absolutely empathize with you. It seems like it would be quite a stressful kind of thing to have to deal with, and it is definitely not “right” at all.

I’m curious, have you tried saying directly to the person who is harassing you that you don’t appreciate being spoken to in that manner? I realize it can be very difficult to say something TO the person themselves about it, especially in an effective/assertive kind of way, but anyway maybe you have already tried that I’m not sure. I don’t understand why companies ever have ANY tolerance for such a thing as that happening really, but hopefully one day it will no longer be a thing that is ever happening in any job, ever.

I know you said you need the job and I’m not sure what field you are in but if you’ve been fighting it for a year now and it’s still happening then perhaps it might be time to seriously consider a new place of work, with a company who will respect your need for being treated in a decent and respectful kind of way. What Mike (1964dodge) recommended about writing down those incidents when they happen is also a great suggestion imo so if you are really preferring not to change jobs then that might be a helpful thing to do as well.

I wish you a lot of luck that it will be resolved soon so you can feel better about going to work each day again. Workplace sexual harassment is definitely a big problem, it might not be much comfort but you are definitely not alone in having to deal with that.
 

KM76710

Kangaroo Manager
SF Pro
SF Supporter
Thanks for your advice, Mike. I need all the help I can get.

I escalated this issue to the very top of the company, and the investigation has proven nothing so far.

The problem is that I am his boss and have to work with him daily while he continues his actions.

I just want it to stop.
I hope that people will change and take the situation seriously and do the right thing for you and who only knows how many others. I know that in the US there are or probably are outlets for the legal route that can be taken and I would check around on the available options are at least online to get an idea of what is out there.
 

MisterBGone

~\_✅`,')
SF Supporter
Tysm MBG and Mike, I appreciate your kindness, caring and thoughtfulness very much! *hug*hug

PS - MBG - Ya I am also feeling very glad and grateful about it all being able to be “checked out” fairly quickly, and of course about my fam being more sincere with their support (as opposed to how they have been for years which is mostly a lot of “talk” about “being here for me” yet not really showing it in a real and sincere way, if that makes sense). Thank you so much for all those kind and thoughtful things you said to me about it, and for being so supportive too, wow! 😮 It is deeply appreciated for sure 😊

Same to you in terms of what you said about “feeling inspired” by me and thinking I have a positive attitude, I always admired reading your kind, funny and positive/ great attitude posts too! 😊

Aw you’re so welcome for the update about it all, I wasn’t sure whether it was “tmi” or anything lol, but in case these end up being my last months on this planet then I at least wanted everyone here to have an idea of “what might have happened to me” if I suddenly ended up never posting again or something.

Anyway hopefully that won’t happen of course, just thought it would be helpful to have “an idea” of what’s going on SHOULD the worst happen, especially since I’ve been a member here for almost 14 (!) years lol. Wasn’t always active though and also maybe most people here wouldn’t really notice or care so I just posted it for those who maybe would. Thank you for being one of them, and for caring, you are definitely very rare and priceless! 😊❤️
Thank you! @JMG - & Yes. You can always ring the emergency dept. or go in yourself, etc. If you feel it is getting out of hand, once again, or furthemore; much more entirely & in "gross," fashion (here, meaning /or as in, 'a lot' of blood loss). . . which can be more difficult to determine, when it has been of chronic variety & type, or for having gone on so long, that you can begin to get used to it. In other words, a more than usual or normal flow than your more than already usual, and normal & etc/so on\so forth~ et cetera!.* (but all of which, as you say, in the worst of case scenarios, could prove catastrophic). So pro-active/& then preventattive, may be best: just if you're uncertain or unsure. Don't want to give in to the tempation to be lulled into a false sense of security. Howeever, if their prescribed course of treatment was pills only, then that might be a good sign of how or where it is, in terms of whefre it stands--as in "now." for their are other more ...blanking on the word? ther's also infusion s & transfuision at their disposal, should they elect or choose to do so. So anyway? All the best to you & thank you for the kind words again. You are ever so wise. ;) later~ :) -mrb.
 

puffymilk

making the bed
SF Supporter
I’m feeling hopeless and defeated. I’m starting to believe there is no such thing as justice. My livelihood has been infected by harassment in the workplace. I have missed work due to worsened mental conditions, and now my finances are a mess.

There was an investigation regarding this harassment, but nothing has happened. I am expected to directly manage someone that sexually harasses me, and I cannot fathom this reality. It makes me disassociate because I cannot cope. I feel unheard and humiliated.

I fear for my future because every day I work with this jerk, I am a nervous wreck. I need this job, but have nothing left to fight with at this point. This has been occurring for over one year now, and my mental health has never been so degraded.
I can't imagine how horrible it is to be in that kind of situation. I am so sorry. I hope for the best possible outcome for you. *console
 

Lane

SF Pro
SF Supporter
A lot of things really, but above all else, very deeply grateful for everyone and everything that has ever been “good and right” in my life, and in a way even some of the more “challenging” people and things too because of the invaluable lessons I have learned from those experiences.

It has been a challenging last few weeks for me. I had heavy bleeding (related to my menstral “cycle” even though it has never been regular) and ended up going to the hospital to see what could be done about it. They prescribed me some pills to take when it was really heavy like that, then I was able to get in quickly for a pelvic ultrasound. After that my doc also wanted me to get a blood test to make sure it wasn’t anything to do with that.

Finally, on Monday (a week ago today, it was on the 12th) I went to my doc and he told me I had uterine fibroids. Now I am waiting to be able to see a gynecologist to discuss options about “what to do about them” but won’t even have the appointment for a couple weeks still. Once I get the appointment then it probably won’t be for at least a couple months from now. I am just really hoping in the next couple months that there won’t be a lot more of those “heavy bleeding” days, it is very stressful dealing with that. It’s making me worry about going out (having to “walk” everywhere and all) so ya it is making things very challenging for sure. Still, it has actually made some very positive things happen in terms of my family. They are finally seeming to make a real, sincere and caring effort to me, guess all it took was a potentially life-threatening thing happening to me, yet my many years of struggling with mental health was never addressed with nearly so much love and supportiveness. Ugh. I know we’ve come a long way from even 10-20 years ago in terms of acknowledging “mental health” and the importance of it, but sometimes it definitely still feels like it has a LONG way to go.

Anyway like I said in the first paragraph, despite these challenges, I feel so grateful that the sincere, deep, caring love and support that I’ve always needed so much from my family is finally being truly given to me :)
Very good to see you again JMG. Although sorry to hear about your health issues. Hope that clears up for you quickly. Glad you have the support of your family too. You're very lucky IMO. *console
 

Lane

SF Pro
SF Supporter
Glad to be taking steps to getting my new job. Today I took a vacation day to take the drug test. I told my boss about my plans already and she knows the organization I'm going to. That was the hard part, telling her. Now I just hope they accept me at the new place mainly because I'm white and it's predominantly black and Spanish. It's nothing new to me, as a child I lived in a group home for a while that was like that and have had jobs that were like that too. I prefer a mixed cultural environment.
 

Lane

SF Pro
SF Supporter
I hope that people will change and take the situation seriously and do the right thing for you and who only knows how many others. I know that in the US there are or probably are outlets for the legal route that can be taken and I would check around on the available options are at least online to get an idea of what is out there.
I have heard that the company basically has it's best interest at heart. Like @KM76710 mentioned, a legal route may be a possiblity for your situation. It's not fair to you and that he gets away with this behavior. I wish you the best.
 

MisterBGone

~\_✅`,')
SF Supporter
Glad to be taking steps to getting my new job. Today I took a vacation day to take the drug test. I told my boss about my plans already and she knows the organization I'm going to. That was the hard part, telling her. Now I just hope they accept me at the new place mainly because I'm white and it's predominantly black and Spanish. It's nothing new to me, as a child I lived in a group home for a while that was like that and have had jobs that were like that too. I prefer a mixed cultural environment.
I'm sure you'll blend in fine, and seamlessly, and that they will respect & appreciate you, for much the same reasons (as your views & feelings on them, and the environment, overall). As it will stand: above all else; I hopefully believe, is that who you are as a person, and your work ethic, etc. is where your proof will be in the putting, or however that saying goes? So hopefully you get - & know, what I mean! ;D I think you'll be great! And have a wonderful opportunity to shine. I remember one time, first time living away from college town, bigger city, second removed from even smaller first home town (w/college sort of being in the middle). But so up to that point, my experience with others, pretty much any where, had been 99.9% white. So that is basically all I knew or know. And so when I went to work at this restaurant, among half the staff being Mexican, and some of them not even speaking English (you soon learn the value of non verbal or unspoken communication). But also, there were I believe, 4 others who looked like me. And were like me, in that they were raised here as well. But all from different original countries. So anyways, there was some initial, "shock-value." Just in terms of like. . . How do I say anything to them? What am I supposed to do? Or I just don't know what to say to them (something like that, I'm forgetting in the many, many intervening years, exactly those lightening bolt three-first thoughts that zipped n' zapped their way through my mind, as I walked from dining room to kitchen, where 'some of them,' stood. Oh, dear??? ;D (but so anyway, it was all fine & good, and so you just sort of come to find out, that nobody end of the day, for the most part gives a care, it's more about, what can I, or you, do for them. How is your performance. Are you trustworthy, what kind of a person are you? Etc. Fun to be around, and I could go on but why? This conversation should be going in reverse if we're talking work history, relevance, and experience, etc. So, I'll leave it there. Unless you tempt me furth3er~ ha!* :D ;) j/k. . .
 

1964dodge

Has a monkey as a friend
Safety & Support
SF Supporter
Tysm MBG and Mike, I appreciate your kindness, caring and thoughtfulness very much! *hug*hug

PS - MBG - Ya I am also feeling very glad and grateful about it all being able to be “checked out” fairly quickly, and of course about my fam being more sincere with their support (as opposed to how they have been for years which is mostly a lot of “talk” about “being here for me” yet not really showing it in a real and sincere way, if that makes sense). Thank you so much for all those kind and thoughtful things you said to me about it, and for being so supportive too, wow! 😮 It is deeply appreciated for sure 😊

Same to you in terms of what you said about “feeling inspired” by me and thinking I have a positive attitude, I always admired reading your kind, funny and positive/ great attitude posts too! 😊

Aw you’re so welcome for the update about it all, I wasn’t sure whether it was “tmi” or anything lol, but in case these end up being my last months on this planet then I at least wanted everyone here to have an idea of “what might have happened to me” if I suddenly ended up never posting again or something.

Anyway hopefully that won’t happen of course, just thought it would be helpful to have “an idea” of what’s going on SHOULD the worst happen, especially since I’ve been a member here for almost 14 (!) years lol. Wasn’t always active though and also maybe most people here wouldn’t really notice or care so I just posted it for those who maybe would. Thank you for being one of them, and for caring, you are definitely very rare and priceless! 😊❤️
you are special and would be missed if you ever leave for any reason @JMG . you are always so upbeat and are so caring and kind to others. you are a gift to this world

mike....*hug*hug*hug*bounce*brohug*shake
 

Please Donate to Help Keep SF Running

Total amount
$45.00
Goal
$255.00
Top