How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[LumberJack]

Now I feel like complete crap. I started off okay this morning. Some intrusive thoughts but also a feeling that it would be a great day. That has worn off and now I feel bad again. Like F-it why even try anymore kind of bad. I’m doing what I can. Between the hectic work of moving and being chronically depressed, I have lapsed on some of my self care. I feel worse than exhausted. Maybe drained is a better word. Like emotionally and physically spent. I want to lie in bed all day today

 

[Survivorist]

Today better. I had a two day down... but today my wife left for Cameroon to get her f.... visa (finally) and if all goes well (and I do not see, why there should be a problem) we will meet again (after 11 months) in August. So this is good. Her daughter will disappear in France (I made sure of that) and study midwife. So kids have left the nest, and we will have a good time - trust me. So, the next few days will be stressful with a lot of physical exercise. I need that. Good news - accident beer is gone and over. Easy.

I am and will always be crazy - you know that if you watch this one:

 

[AvidFan]

Now I feel like complete crap. I started off okay this morning. Some intrusive thoughts but also a feeling that it would be a great day. That has worn off and now I feel bad again. Like F-it why even try anymore kind of bad. I’m doing what I can. Between the hectic work of moving and being chronically depressed, I have lapsed on some of my self care. I feel worse than exhausted. Maybe drained is a better word. Like emotionally and physically spent. I want to lie in bed all day today

Sorry to hear that. I had a weirdly good start to the day as well which then crumbled a bit. Trying to regroup. I am going to go out and run shortly to address the anxiety symptoms. I hope you can feel better soon

 

[Aurelia]

Good luck with it. As if on cue my anxiety has come flooding back. It's not mental, I wasn't thinking about anything in particular, just chilling on my sofa - but suddenly started getting the lurching stomach etc and that made me feel anxious and then it started up in other ways. The physical side is horrible.

Yeah, there's not always a reason for me either. Sometimes it just starts up and I can't think of why.

 

[AvidFan]

Ok-ish. Had a real bad hour of my stomach churning and trying to get a feeling of dread going in my mind as well. I refused to cave in, at one point, in lieu of a treadmill, I went up my stairs and down again 5 or 6 times. They're quite steep so it got my heart rate up and my body seems to have interpreted this as dealing with the situation, so the sensations have died down for the time being. Funny how this all works. Still going to get out for a proper run now the tennis is over.

 

[nicktheundoer]

Like im flying

Niceeee..... 😀😀😀😀😀

 

[nicktheundoer]

Now I feel like complete crap. I started off okay this morning. Some intrusive thoughts but also a feeling that it would be a great day. That has worn off and now I feel bad again. Like F-it why even try anymore kind of bad. I’m doing what I can. Between the hectic work of moving and being chronically depressed, I have lapsed on some of my self care. I feel worse than exhausted. Maybe drained is a better word. Like emotionally and physically spent. I want to lie in bed all day today

Wishing you to be free from these feelings..hugs......

 

[nicktheundoer]

Starting to feel a bit better. Who even knows anymore why I get anxious. Sometimes I am and sometimes I'm not and there doesn't seem to be any clear reason for it.

Same....

 

[Empress00]

Sorry you are feeling like this, but I understand.

Thanks 🤗

 

[Aurelia]

I won't mention the issue in particular, but I'm sure you'll all know what I'm talking about. I just don't get why so many people freak out about politics. I just had my therapist tell me a lot of her clients are upset over recent happenings. It's like...why? Why let it affect your mental stability? Life goes on.

 

[Justagirl]

Nervous. Tomorrow I will go to the beach and I'm scared that people will laugh or look at my scars. I will go for the first time in so many years because I've been not feeling so comfortable.

 

[Livelife]

I just went 3 days during and after the hurricane this week without electric and a/c. It was rough in the heat but we made it or I would have been on the road out of town somewhere. So I’m pretty grateful right now. Now I would do cartwheels to have Google and internet and tv access back.

 

[LumberJack]

I feel agony and ecstasy at the same time. I am fairly sure that I am not manic, though. No hyper-anything and no grandiose excitement. Rather it’s like I see things as pairs of opposites.

Consumerism for example. I love to shop online. To get anything I need, in any color or configuration that I want. To have the (near) instant gratification of tapping a button on my app and having stuff at my door next day or sooner. Going out to shop is something I procrastinate for days so anything that shows up within a week is rapid for me.

However, it’s exploitative of poor countries. It leads to vapid superficiality and jealousy or competition. It’s environmentally damaging. Everything I buy comes with a tinge of guilt that I am so fortunate, but the person who made my clothes in Pakistan or Bangladesh probably doesn’t have access to clean water or protection from mosquitoes.

Anything I consider has these two sides, one amazing and the other depressing. I’m probably overthinking it. If overthinking was a job, I’d be rich. I can’t seem to stop though. Just so much running through my mind at any given time. It’s paralyzing. Maybe that’s because I’m mentally ill. Maybe I am mentally ill because I can’t turn down my excessively wordy mind. Either way, I feel out of control. Which also is fun and terrifying at the same time. How do I at least slow down the flow of thoughts thoughts and more thoughts without losing my intellectual edge? How do I shorten my posts so that they are readable in a reasonable amount of time?

 

[LumberJack]

I just went 3 days during and after the hurricane this week without electric and a/c. It was rough in the heat but we made it or I would have been on the road out of town somewhere. So I’m pretty grateful right now. Now I would do cartwheels to have Google and internet and tv access back.

I’m sorry you had to go through that, and don’t have internet or TV yet. Wow I would mentally starve if I had to go 7 days or more without WiFi. May the utilities be restored soon.

 

[Survivorist]

@LumberJack Ok, you are furntunate (like many of us in the west). Go there were the things are made and have a look. Bangladesh, India or even to a country where nothing is really made (like Uganda). It will change you. Good experience. Ever since I am an absolute minimalist and live on 10 per day.

 

[LumberJack]

Nervous. Tomorrow I will go to the beach and I'm scared that people will laugh or look at my scars. I will go for the first time in so many years because I've been not feeling so comfortable.

I can understand that feeling. It’s nerve wracking to be self conscious and anxious. Especially about how we look at the beach! Something that I am trying out is disregarding what others may think. Unless I am in love with them, or they sign my paycheck, they can’t hurt me if they judge me as not being enough or doing enough. It works sometimes. I think it gets easier with practice.

 

[Justagirl]

I can understand that feeling. It’s nerve wracking to be self conscious and anxious. Especially about how we look at the beach! Something that I am trying out is disregarding what others may think. Unless I am in love with them, or they sign my paycheck, they can’t hurt me if they judge me as not being enough or doing enough. It works sometimes. I think it gets easier with practice.

Thank you very much for your words. That is what I've been trying to do with my therapist but it can be difficult to ignore what other think about me, even if I don't know them. But I will try Thank you again, you are very supportive

 

[LumberJack]

@LumberJack Ok, you are furntunate (like many of us in the west). Go there were the things are made and have a look. Bangladesh, India or even to a country where nothing is really made (like Uganda). It will change you. Good experience. Ever since I am an absolute minimalist and live on 10 per day.

That sounds horrifying. I’m so hooked on my creature comforts, such as high speed internet connection, soft clothing, and air conditioning, that I am anxious about any travel, but especially to places that are impoverished or unstable. I have compassion for the plights of all people on the losing side of capitalism.

Maybe I should do that, though to learn more empathy. It’s an interesting idea. I traveled frequently when I was younger. So much that I no longer enjoy it.

I feel like I have seen what I want to in this life, which is essentially Italy and Germany. I have never done any travel to difficult locales though. I’m too afraid of something going wrong like a bus crash or catching a stray bullet (which is ironic since I contemplate suicide more often than not).

 

[Livelife]

I’m sorry you had to go through that, and don’t have internet or TV yet. Wow I would mentally starve if I had to go 7 days or more without WiFi. May the utilities be restored soon.

Thanks. I’m there already🙃at day 7 looking to be several more….I just got a message from someone in a neighborhood fb group that Ezee and ATT had generators running but Xfinity is doing nothing and isn’t that a statement🙁

 

[Livelife]

That sounds horrifying. I’m so hooked on my creature comforts, such as high speed internet connection, soft clothing, and air conditioning, that I am anxious about any travel, but especially to places that are impoverished or unstable. I have compassion for the plights of all people on the losing side of capitalism.

Maybe I should do that, though to learn more empathy. It’s an interesting idea. I traveled frequently when I was younger. So much that I no longer enjoy it.

I feel like I have seen what I want to in this life, which is essentially Italy and Germany. I have never done any travel to difficult locales though. I’m too afraid of something going wrong like a bus crash or catching a stray bullet (which is ironic since I contemplate suicide more often than not).

I love any kind travel almost. The last trip I took was to India for quite awhile and I got back the month before covid. I went to Thailand a couple of years before that. The people in both places were wonderful and the comfort accessibility was much more than any uncomfortable hours spent.
I’m so ready to go somewhere I’ve not been and not break the bank like to a few places in Europe😊 South America has always been on my list but there is a lot of potential weirdness that can happen in the countries there I want to see that I’ve heard about in the last few years from different people and sources….