How Are You Feeling Right Now?

[cymbele]

Trying very hard not to kill myself. I really want to end it all right now. I wouldn't mind having a jet engine fall on me right now (Donnie Darko reference)

Please call for help if you are struggling. You can always pm me but support at this time is better ifl.

 

[cymbele]

Reflecting over the past year, I have been mildly depressed for most of it. No energy to keep exercising, making crafts, seeing people. Hopefully now that I recognize where I have been emotionally maybe I can change.

 

[AnHeroTransGirl]

terrible, very terrible

 

[SillyOldBear]

Lousy, frustrated, angry. I don't know how people like @1964dodge and @Jezah81 live with so much pain. Mine is less, for now anyway, and I don't want to go on. Doctors have been useless and have no time for appointments. Physical therapy referrals do not return calls. I wish I had the will to end my life. I have the means, but not the will. And, regardless of my prayers, I keep waking up in the morning.

 

[Windhover]

Feeling better than yesterday. A good sleep with no remembered bad dreams helped. Physically, the rib is beginning to hurt less. I don't feel like crap today, just neutral, so that's good.

 

[Gonz]

Feeling better than yesterday. A good sleep with no remembered bad dreams helped. Physically, the rib is beginning to hurt less. I don't feel like crap today, just neutral, so that's good.

I’m the opposite today, still tired, back sore, head full of stressful dreams with no resolution. Also hungry but too lazy to make something, but that seems petty.

 

[Inastorm]

Lousy, frustrated, angry. I don't know how people like @1964dodge and @Jezah81 live with so much pain. Mine is less, for now anyway, and I don't want to go on. Doctors have been useless and have no time for appointments. Physical therapy referrals do not return calls. I wish I had the will to end my life. I have the means, but not the will. And, regardless of my prayers, I keep waking up in the morning.

Sorry your feeling like this, sounds rubbish. Out of interest is there anything you would like to do before you go home?

 

[SillyOldBear]

Sorry your feeling like this, sounds rubbish. Out of interest is there anything you would like to do before you go home?

That is a good question. I think I would like to like myself. To look in the mirror and smile.

 

[ClassicsFan]

Surprised. I was expecting to get a voicemail from my former coworker, but she picked up the phone.

 

[Inastorm]

That is a good question. I think I would like to like myself. To look in the mirror and smile.

Have you ever tried that?, to look at yourself in the mirror and pull a big smile at yourself?, it can be a nice feeling. I kind of find it like a sign of respect.

 

[Windhover]

I’m the opposite today, still tired, back sore, head full of stressful dreams with no resolution. Also hungry but too lazy to make something, but that seems petty.

I'd send some of this very welcomed neutrality in your way if I could.
Hope you eventually got something good to eat Gonz.

 

[BlackSheep 007]

Well, I had a real interesting life - a fucked up childhood with a crazy religious mother, a youth with drugs and prison time, a life abroad with a good job, my wife who loves me (do not know why..) - but now I am facing the end. I do not want any longer - I had it all... I can no more. I simply can't take it any more. You know this feeling? Just want to go.... to have peace once and for all!!

 

[TragicReality]

I hate myself.

 

[Jezah81]

Tired physically from insomnia and need to work in 100 F weather. Joints hurt. Feeling old. Anxiety attacks in bed when I toss and turn, thoughts of ending my existence is hard to overcome when I'm in this loop of despair.

 

[AmberMarie]

Exhausted... up and down all night. Alone. i know sf is here... however none of you are "Here" and "Here" is where i am alone. Sorry, it's the only way i can describe it.

 

[cymbele]

Doing a gift exchange in a few minutes. Wondering if the person will really personalize the gift or it will be something completely wacky and have no real connection to me. I try to buy/make gifts that mean something but not everyone does. I usually get gifts from this person that I have given HER. So I dunno if i'll be disappointed.

 

[puffymilk]

Absolutely exhausted

 

[Windhover]

I need coffee.

 

[ClassicsFan]

Like I need to talk with a therapist.

 

[crowgarden]

i didn't sleep for 8 days. again. i'm used to not sleeping for days at a time but it's getting way worse and the hallucinations aren't helping.