How do you deal with that particular mood? The best way I can think of describing it is cynical. All I want to is cause myself pain. I'm not even sure if this is in the right forum. I'm stuck. I'm so stuck. All I can think about it hurting myself. Doing damage to myself. I don't know what to do when I'm like this. I don't know how to get out of it, only to ride it out doing what my demons tell me to do. I'm meant to be meeting friends but they'll be an hour late. Bit late for me to go back home but I hate it that they will be so late. How dare they leave me for an hour on my own in public? I know they didn't mean to be this late, shit happens right? But god I hate it so much when people are late. Screw 'better late than never'. No. You said you would be here at this time and you are not. I can feel myself going into hysterics because they don't be there at the same time as me how pathetic is that?!