I'm so fucking stupid. I'm a constant burden on my boyfriend. I just cause him pain and upset all of the time. Having to cope with me as a girlfriend is like a full time job and I can't see anything that would possibly make it worth it. I'm so fucking useless that I take a boy who hasn't cried for a year and a half, and now he's always crying, because I make him that miserable. I make him feel that guilty and helpless that he fucking cries all the time. Because of me. Not talking a few tears here either.
Honestly, it would be much better if I was alone. Then I could just sit and sulk all I wanted and no one would have to put up with it. I wish I could just lock myself away from the entire world and just be fucking alone. And not have to try and work out where things are going or what I want or how I'm going to keep this guy happy who sacrifices all his time to look after this pathetic, depressed girl who treats him like shit.
I deserve to be alone just for the way I treat people. And I should be alone just so they don't have to suffer my depression too.
Honestly, it would be much better if I was alone. Then I could just sit and sulk all I wanted and no one would have to put up with it. I wish I could just lock myself away from the entire world and just be fucking alone. And not have to try and work out where things are going or what I want or how I'm going to keep this guy happy who sacrifices all his time to look after this pathetic, depressed girl who treats him like shit.
I deserve to be alone just for the way I treat people. And I should be alone just so they don't have to suffer my depression too.