I Don’t Know if This Belongs Here...

[Midnightbadger]

Lost my cat of 20 years in November. Both unexpectedly and expectedly. Thought there was a month, there was apparently only two days left. I’ve only turned 26 a week ago. So it’s been a long time with this pet and being with it everyday of my life pretty much.
Recently moved into a space on my own with no roommates. I’ve never felt so crushingly and truly alone in my life.

 

[Atreides]

That's a long time to have a cat. I bet you took great care of it. And I'm sure it felt all the love you had to give. I can understand you feel alone without it. Just remember you're not alone. We're here for you.

 

[may71]

Sorry that you lost your and have been feeling so alone.

I Don’t Know if This Belongs Here...

Yes, it absolutely belongs here. It doesn't matter the reason why you are grieving, if you are feeling grief, it's ok to post in this forum.

Lost my cat of 20 years in November

Wow, 20 years is a long time. And you're 26, so it's like you had your cat for probably about as long as you can remember.

Both unexpectedly and expectedly. Thought there was a month, there was apparently only two days left

I'm glad that you at least knew it was coming, though I'm sure it was a shock.

It sounds like you gave your cat a long and happy life with a lot of love. In time, the grief over losing your cat might be replaced with gratitude for having a pet that you loved so much for so long.

Is there anything that might help you feel less alone?

 

[Midnightbadger]

Sorry that you lost your and have been feeling so alone.

Yes, it absolutely belongs here. It doesn't matter the reason why you are grieving, if you are feeling grief, it's ok to post in this forum.


Wow, 20 years is a long time. And you're 26, so it's like you had your cat for probably about as long as you can remember.

I'm glad that you at least knew it was coming, though I'm sure it was a shock.

It sounds like you gave your cat a long and happy life with a lot of love. In time, the grief over losing your cat might be replaced with gratitude for having a pet that you loved so much for so long.

Is there anything that might help you feel less alone?

Thank you for replying. I’m not sure what could make me feel less alone honestly as it’s just a visceral feeling of emptiness to a room. As my dad has said before “It’s nice to just have something alive waiting at home for you.”
There’s no joy to coming home anymore. I live a five minute walk from work now but still pack lunches because it feels like there is nothing to gain from going home.

the loss mixed with the usual loneliness I’ve felt for human connection is just such a crushing feeling of emptiness and I don’t think I’ve ever truly been alone in a space in my whole life.

 

[Midnightbadger]

That's a long time to have a cat. I bet you took great care of it. And I'm sure it felt all the love you had to give. I can understand you feel alone without it. Just remember you're not alone. We're here for you.

Thank you. Sometimes it helps to chat. I feel like there aren’t many people to talk to properly about it all. After all it’s just a pet right?

 

[Atreides]

Thank you. Sometimes it helps to chat. I feel like there aren’t many people to talk to properly about it all. After all it’s just a pet right?

The importance and meaning of pets are different for everyone. Some people get attached to their pets more easily than other. For some people, a pet can be a best friend. When I was a kid, I thought of my border collie Summer as my best friend. I can tell your hamster meant a lot to you. I'm glad have us to chat to. Feel free to chat with us anytime.

 

[may71]

Thank you for replying

You're welcome!

Do you see this as something that won't hurt so much in time, or is it hard to imagine things ever getting better?

 

[may71]

After all it’s just a pet right?

I think most folks on SF understand how important a pet can be. For a lot of people, pets are more important than any human has ever been in their lives.

The grief you are experiencing is probably more intense than what a lot of people experience when they lose a relative or spouse, especially because you were feeling so alone to begin with.

 

[Livelife]

I'm sorry to hear about your beloved pet, a presence with you most of your life. And living alone is quite an adjustment....maybe you'll be able to have roommates again in the future if you want?

 

[KM76710]

Welcome to the forum, sad to hear the loss of your cat family.

 

[Midnightbadger]

You're welcome!

Do you see this as something that won't hurt so much in time, or is it hard to imagine things ever getting better?

Honestly, I could never really imagine life without her. I knew it would happen one day, but the world seems so different I was calling the days following the “new reality.” I’m not sure I can really imagine things being better.

 

[Midnightbadger]

I think most folks on SF understand how important a pet can be. For a lot of people, pets are more important than any human has ever been in their lives.

The grief you are experiencing is probably more intense than what a lot of people experience when they lose a relative or spouse, especially because you were feeling so alone to begin with.

Thank you. Yeah, she was always there when I needed her. Always a constant and there friend. We’d been through a lot as my dad would say.

 

[Midnightbadger]

Welcome to the forum, sad to hear the loss of your cat family.

Thank you.

 

[Midnightbadger]

I'm sorry to hear about your beloved pet, a presence with you most of your life. And living alone is quite an adjustment....maybe you'll be able to have roommates again in the future if you want?

I live in a major city so housing wise I think It’d be pretty easy to find a collective to move in with. It was a little bit of a rush move from a place I’d spent 5 years. I’d been wanting to leave for a few years and between the current roommate I had and needing a new place where ever sound didn’t make me think of the cat... I’d woken up in the middle of the night a few times because I thought I heard her in need. She was rather old so needed lots of care.

 

[KM76710]

Thank you.

Most welcome, a number of months ago I adopted a cat, or she rescued me, great little companion especially once she saw that food and water would be put out for her which was lacking in her previous house(can't call it a home, for her at least), but I do believe she knows hypnotism and has me trained. I hope that she and I share many years as friends together like you two had.

 

[jamieblue1]

Lost my cat of 20 years in November. Both unexpectedly and expectedly. Thought there was a month, there was apparently only two days left. I’ve only turned 26 a week ago. So it’s been a long time with this pet and being with it everyday of my life pretty much.
Recently moved into a space on my own with no roommates. I’ve never felt so crushingly and truly alone in my life.

I'm so sorry for your loss. 20 years is a long time! No other cat will replace the one you lost but perhaps in time you can give a loving home to a new furry friend? Animals truly are such a blessing. Unconditional love and an authentic connection is hard to beat. Hugs.

 

[may71]

We’d been through a lot as my dad would say

Is your dad a source of support for you now?

 

[Midnightbadger]

Is your dad a source of support for you now?

Yes and no. He cares but as a family we’ve been through a lot and aren’t super close. There’s also a strong differing of ideology between the two of us.

 

[may71]

Do you feel like any of your family relationships could be repaired?

There’s also a strong differing of ideology between the two of us

Is there a way the gap could be bridged? For example, if you both agreed not to talk about politics?